“Am I hurting you, baby?” She presses her swollen, overly-kissed lips together while arching her back for more, shaking her head no.Fuck, she is perfectly curved. Her pussy is medicating, I am falling addicted to her touch, her taste, the way she grips me.
Her eyes roll back, making me grin devilishly. “That’s right, baby, lose it for me.” Tightness is gripping me; the barrier between who we were and who we are is going to change the moment I break through, taking all she is giving me, while I give her all I am and all I have. “This might hurt for a minute. I’ll go slow.” She bites her lip and grins, giving me theSpencer, just do it, look, I so often get. With that, I push myself deeper, taking her, breaking the barrier of innocence, as a bloody hue glides across the rubber. She’s given me all of her, but she already had almost all of me; it was only a matter of time before I gave her the final piece.
Her legs wrap around my waist as my hand roams over the curves of her thigh. Holding her leg, I lean back, watching the perfect show, “You’re doing so good, baby. Such a damn angel.” I thrust in and out of her, while my finger presses on her sensitive bud, her leg pulls against my hold, keeping her open. Watching her lose it, her body speaks to me, telling me everything she needs.
“Spence, I’m coming.”Words of a God damn angel.“Don’t stop!” The words fall from her beautiful lips, and my body devours her soft moans, like the best fucking drug of my life, eager for my next fix. Don’t come, I don’t want this to be over. Hold it, Spencer. Pumping into her slowly, looking into those eyes that have stolen my soul.
The world has tried to break her; she has tried to break herself, but she can rest assured that I will build her back up until she rises from the ashes. Stealing her lips once more, thrusting into her, I lean down, feeling my release rising, begging to explode. “You are worthy, you are beautiful, and one day when you are ready, you will be all mine.” Her arms wrapped around my shoulders, her fingernails digging into my biceps. “I love you, my beautiful. Scar.” With one final thrust, my release fills the condom, just as Scar filled my heart. We entered this room as two separate individuals, but we are leaving it as one.
Pulling out of her was like leaving home, and all you want to do is go back inside and get warm. She is my home, whether she believes it or not.
Rolling onto my back, she rolls over and kisses my breathless lips. “Let me go clean up, and I’ll be right out. Don't move.” I slide off my bed, grounding myself before looking back at her, to ensure she is staying put. Sliding the condom off, a sense of peace washes over me. To be almost nineteen and a virgin isn’t ideal to many, but it was for me. To find her was worth the wait, and now I’m not letting her go. She can think she calls the shots, but even when she walks out the door tomorrow, she will still be mine.
Making my way back to her, she lies there spent with my sheet draped over her bottom half. Sliding in next to her, I pull her into me. “How do you feel, baby?” The illuminating smile tells me she feels perfectly fine. Placing her hand around my neck, her thumb grazes my neck, and as if my dick didn’t just run a marathon, it twitches at her touch.
“I feel incredible, that was amazing. I’m sore, but I expected it, especially with… your size.” She laughs and kisses me once again. “Spence, thank you.” I push her fallen hair behind her ear before locking my eyes with her sparkling ones.
“You don’t ever have to thank me for loving you. Loving you is easy; loving you has brought me peace I didn’t know I needed. You are forever my Scar, you have scared my heart most beautifully, forever leaving your mark.” Her eyes light up as she absorbs my confession. “ I mean it when I tell you, I love you. I don’t say it for gratitude or because I think it's what you want to hear. I say it because I know the importance of the word. I have watched my parents love and love hard my whole life, and all I thought was, 'I want that, I want that all-consuming love. You are it for me, Scar, my all-consuming, heart forever altered, love.” Her eyes drop to my lips as she pulls me into her.
She whispers into my ear, “When I love myself as much as you love me, I’ll be ready to love you how you deserve, because you deserve everything I can’t give you right now. Hold onto that love, Spence, because I’m coming back once I put out my fires, and when I do, I want that scar to be the only one ignited by our love and passion.”
I hold her in my arms tightly, because the truth is, I don’t know how long it will take her, but time is no object when it comes to love. I will love her today, and I will love her every day after, and when she is ready to call me hers, I’m only going to love her harder.
Chapter 35
Not Goodbye
Scarlett
Waking up in Spencer’s bed was a peace I never knew. Yet, here I am, leaving it. It’s time for me to find strength within myself, to become who I need to be, and give to others what they have given to me. Strength is walking out of this room, leaving behind the one person who has ever truly loved me, but I love him enough to know I am not ready.
Sliding out of bed was nerve-racking; I knew if I woke him, he would beg me to stay for five more minutes, and it was time for me to leave. Ever so quietly, I step down the stairs, my footsteps light like feathers, holding my breath firmly until I reach the bottom. Just when I thought I was in the clear, Mrs. Collins snuck around the banister with a coffee cup in hand.
“Good morning, sweetheart. Why don't you sneak into the back yard and tell me why you're sneaking out of my house at five in the morning?” She smiles, taking my arm and guiding me to the back patio.
The moment my ass hits the lawn chair, I tell the poor woman everything. Well, I did leave out that my father beats me, and the fact that her son and I took each other's virginities last night, but everything else comes out easily. “I love him, I do. I just have to figure out how to love myself before I can truly love him.” Anna wipes a tear from her eye. “Please don’t cry.” Patting me on the leg, she leans forward.
“Sweetie, are you talking to someone? Without risk of overstepping, I would like to make you an open offer. I’d be happy to listen to you; I am a therapist, after all. Given that you don’t typically go to one, it makes me believe there is a reason, and whatever that reason may be, I am here, free of charge and completely confidential. I promise I won’t judge you, sweetheart. I love you like my own, and it pains me to see you this way, and I want you to know— I want to help you.”She doesn’t even know half of it, and she won’t. But what other option do I have? If I tell the school counselor, they will tell Grant due to the self-harm involved. I can't pay one because Grant will see the charge on our cards. It would have to be cash, but what clinic would do it under the table? This is my best choice.
I take a deep breath, thinking through what I would be doing. After reviewing it in my head, I agree. “Okay, when do we start?” She stands up.
“Let’s do it every Tuesday. Spencer has conditioning and practice, late nights, and David has work meetings until five. Let’s plan on four?” I give her a grateful smile and walk home as she disappears back into the house.
Sneaking inside the same way Spencer sneaks in, I close my window quietly and lie in bed, waiting for sleep to find me. Having stayed up to three a.m. only to sneak out at five, it didn’t leave me much time for much sleep.
Once sleep finally comes, it keeps me in its hold for half the day, until Levi storms into my room, waking me from my much-needed slumber.
“Letty, wake up.” I rub my eyes and sit up, finding his blurry figure on the edge of my bed.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” I sit up, finding my bearings.
“I got a side job; I’m going to start working extra to save money so we can get out of here.” I smile at his eagerness.
“That’s great, I am happy for you, where are you?” His smile grows, showing all his pearly teeth, as he stands up with his hands on his hips.
“Next door, I am going to work on Mr. Collin’s cars when they need maintenance." He still stands like a superhero, completely proud of himself, as he should be.
“Good job! Anna has offered to give me off-the-record therapy sessions every Tuesday. I think it would be the best bet, because no office would accept under-the-table cash, and theschool will likely inform Grant. I just have to figure out how to pay her, anyway. How was Maddie last night? You two better?” He smirks and nods his head.
