“You gotta take the test, Clem. It’s time.” He brushed past me—his hand accidentally skimming across my left thigh, sending heat down both legs—and into the bathroom. Then he pulled one of the pregnancy tests we’d bought at the grocery store out from under the sink. “You can’t keep putting it off.”
I crossed my arms. “But I like this place called Denial. It’s comfortable here.”
He gave me a small smile and his eyes crinkled at the corners. “Good thing I’m here to remind you, that you actually live in Reality.” He held a finger up. “Hold on. I got you something.”
“Okay.” I chewed my lip, wondering what it could be.
He came out of his room with his hands behind his back. “Ta-dah.” His palm opened to reveal a bottle of prenatal vitamins.
I looked at the vitamins and then back up at him. My heart swelled, and I stood there, staring at him, my mouthslightly parted. Billy never would’ve done something like that. It wouldn’t have occurred to him. I couldn’t remember the last time he’d been in a grocery store, much less bought something for me.
“You probably need some extra iron and folic acid. This stuff is supposed to make your hair and nails grow like crazy.” He pretended to study the label. “Maybe I should take some of these.” Nervously, he shifted from one foot to the other.
Our fingers brushed when I took the bottle out of his hands. He pulled back like I’d burned him. Why did he have to overdo every reaction toward me? I was starting to think he found me revolting.
“Thanks. That’s really thoughtful.”
He rubbed his neck. “You bet.” Silas was so freaking confusing.
I sighed and took the pregnancy test from his other hand. I turned for the bathroom.
“Wait.” He caught me by the arm. “Do you want me to wait with you, after?” Oh my gosh. His moods were giving me whiplash.
I swallowed and gave myself a moment, trying to shake off the confusion. “Sure. That would be great.”
He leaned against the wall. “I’ll wait out here.”
I went inside and shut the door. My heart raced as I tore the box open, even though I knew what the result would be. I’d never gone this long without a period since I started back in seventh grade. And the morning sickness was still going strong.
The instructions said it would take one to three minutes before I would know. Once I’d peed, I laid the test on the counter and washed my hands. I purposely didn’t look at the stick before I went into the hall and shut the door.
Silas and I sat down together. I set a timer on my phone for three minutes.
My hands twisted around each other.
“So, how was your HIIT class today?” he asked. I’m sure trying to take my mind off of thin pink lines.
“Kinda terrible. If my heart rate goes over one-fifty, I get lightheaded. I keep having to modify every exercise. The ladies have to be wondering what is going on.”
He picked a piece of lint off of his shorts. Even his calves were ripped. “Well, once this is over, you can start telling people and they’ll understand.” Like it was as simple as that.
I shook my head. “No. I’m not telling anyone until I can’t hide it anymore. Not even Momma.”
“Clem,” he chided. “Don’t you think she deserves to know?”
The lecturing rankled me. He made it sound so simple. My situation was anything but. “The minute I tell her will be the last minute of peace I get. She’ll want to go shopping and tell all her friends…”
He appeared flummoxed, like I was being unreasonable. “She’s going to be a grandma. Of course she’ll be excited. You should be excited too.”
“Well, I’m not, okay? And I know that sounds terrible, but you don’t understand what it’s like for me. I don’t have a husband or my best friend or anybody?—”
“You have me. I’m your friend.”
I wanted to smack the condescending smile off his face. Friend? We lived in the same house and he chose to be anywhere but where I was. We weren’t friends. “For the next two and a half months, and then you’re going back to Wyoming, and I’ll probably never hear from you again.”
He leaned away a little, probably getting PTSD flashbacks from my tire-slashing rampage. Well, good. I’d had about enough of stupid men.
He scratched his jaw. “You’ll hear from me. We’re sharing Anna. We’ll have to talk. And I’m here right now.” We'llhaveto talk? Could he hear himself? Did he actually think our current relationship was something I could lean on? This friendship was about as steady as a ladder with only one foot on the ground. And I knew he knew that. So what he was really saying was, I’ll be here for you now and then I’m out of here. See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya.
