I wince, shaking my head vigorously. “I shouldnothave said that. It’s not true. He’s a good guy, and he just wants to make you happy, whatever that means. And at the end of the day, all that really matters is whetheryouwant this life for yourself. Don’t listen to me or Mum or anybody else who tries to tell you how you should live. The truth is, none of us have the answers. I think we’re all just making it up as we go along and hoping for the best.”
“Even you?”
“Especiallyme. Now, what do you say? Do you think you’ve kept that man of yours waiting long enough?”
Amber nods, fanning her face with her perfectly manicured hands. “How do I look?”
“Beautiful, as always.” I stand and hold both hands out to her to help her up. “I’m so sorry if I made you question yourself. I had no right to do that.”
“It’s okay. I know you just want the best for me.”
“I do,” I say, taking her cheeks in both hands. “But what I failed to realize is that you’re not some little kid anymore, needing your big sister to tell you what to do. You’re an adult, andyouknow what’s best for you.”
Her face twists up into an ugly cry, and she reaches for me, sobbing as she wraps her arms around me and pulls me in for a monster hug. “I’m so sorry about what happened,” she says.
“I’m sorry, too. I never should’ve come on the trip. Not when I knew there was about an 80% chance I was going to spoil the fun.”
“No, it’s my fault,” she says, shaking her head. “I shouldn’t have been so pushy about everything. You were right about Randy Andy. We’re all so infected. We should have listened to you.”
Smiling through her tears, she says, “I missed you so much these last few weeks, and it made me realize that I need to accept you for who you are. You’ll never be fun or exciting, but that’s okay because you’re so much more than that. You’re smart and talented, and you’re going to be wildly successful, and I’m really proud of you.”
A lump forms in my throat. “Thanks, sweetie. I really needed to hear that.”
We walk arm-in-arm down the beach, catching up in that we-need-to-talk-fast-because-there’s-so-much-to-say sort of way. Amber tells me in excruciating detail about their tattoo infections and about the rest of the hen’s weekend, which turns out to have been a total bust with Kandi and Valerie getting into a huge row which got them kicked out of a restaurant on Saturday night. Then the entire party spent Sunday alternating who could use the bathroom to get sick in. I tell her about the horrible, sweaty bar exams and the butterflies and Leo, and that I think I may have ruined the best thing that ever happened to me—aside from having the world’s best sister, and Izzy, and hopefully my career, if it happens.
By the time we reach the parking lot, the sun is out, and all feels right in the world. Well, almost everything anyway. Amber rushes ahead to Dane, who is leaning up against the side of my little Corolla with his head hanging down and his arms crossed. She calls out his name, and he turns, his face instantly breaking into a look of pure joy as he holds his arms out to her. I hang back on the beach, feeling very much the third wheel as I give them time to reunite and reassure each other that they’ll be just fine.
I turn and face the sea, suddenly realizing I am in the exact spot I was when Leo brought me here. Regret blooms, crowding out any joy I felt at helping my sister and Dane sort things out. The truth is, Leo was right. I’ve done a spectacular job of judging my way out of what could have been a wonderful life.I’mthe reason he left. He didn’t leave because he’s irresponsible. He left because I didn’t give him a reason to stay.
CHAPTER 37
Sisters and Their Misters
Brianna
I arrived at my parents’ house at 5 a.m. to have my hair and makeup done and was greeted by a mostly silent bridal party, all of whom are sporting matching bandages on their upper backs in place of Celtic sisterhood hearts.
Now, as we stand at the back of the large cathedral where over two hundred guests wait to catch a glimpse of my little sister, I feel completely choked up with emotion. I’m overcome with happiness for her, but at the same time, I’ve never felt so alone in my life.
Kandi, Quinn, and Valerie all line up, shoulders back, ready to make their grand entrances. Bruno Mars “I Think I Want to Marry You” starts, and the three make their way up the aisle in a coordinated dance routine that is slightly shocking, kind of inappropriate, and definitely very attention-grabby. It’s sort of flash mob meets strip club, except in a church.
Isabelle stands in front of us, watching and waiting for me to give her the okay to go. Our poor dad stands next to Amber, looking as nervous as a one-armed squid in a shark tank. He takes a handkerchief out of his pocket and mops his brow, then pats Amber’s hand. “You look just beautiful, sweetie.” Turning to me, he says, “You, too, Breenut.”
“Thanks, Dad,” Amber says, tearing up and fanning her eyes with her hands.
“He’s right,” I say. “You’re absolutely stunning, Amber. Dane is lucky to have you.”
Her face falls for a second, and I quickly add, “And you’re lucky to have him, too.”
I turn to the front and am just about to tell Isabelle to go when my heart starts to pound so hard I can hear it in my eardrums. Leo is standing in the last pew, smiling at me and looking ludicrously handsome. My knees go weak, and I’m momentarily unaware of what my body and face are doing. It must be noticeably stupid though because Izzy tugs at my hand and says, “Mummy, why is your mouth hanging open?”
Not breaking eye contact with Leo, I say, “Yes, sweetie. It’s your turn.”
“What?” she asks.
I glance down at her, my entire face hot with embarrassment. “Sorry, what?”
“Okay, Izzy, you can go now,” Amber says, tapping her on the shoulder.
