I laughed despite myself, relieved that he was taking it so easily. Aside from his initial irritation that he wasn’t the only potential father, I mean.
“You’re sure you still want to go out with me?”
“Even more now. Get your coat, let’s go,” Noah instructed.
I grabbed my dress jacket off the coat rack.
Chapter Eighteen
Noah
* * *
As the waitress, Gabrielle, led us over to a private table, I let out a breath of relief. Ever since Nellie dropped the news, my head had been buzzing with a thousand thoughts. I’d always taken extra caution to use protection every single encounter I had, but…
I couldn’t for the life of me remember if I had with Nellie. From the first time I laid eyes on her, I’d been consumed. I’d written it off at the time as being really drunk, but after seeing her again, after hiring her and having her become a part of my daily life, I knew that wasn’t entirely true.
I mean, I’d still been drunk enough to not remember if I’d grabbed a condom, but I realized my hyperfocus on her wasn’t purely alcohol-driven. Something about her soul called to mine. I’d been so wrapped up in the moment, so utterly captivated.
“Here you are,” Gabrielle smiled, laying out our menus on the beautifully set table for two. There were fancy glasses full of lemon ice water and a low centerpiece of winter greenery with a touch of gold.
Gabrielle had gone to school with my older brother, Damien. They used to date back in high school, so she knew our family well. The breakup had been amicable, and she was seeing someone from Springwood, last I heard.
I’d originally chosen this venue not only because it was the most romantic place in town to dine, but because I knew Gabrielle would spread word that she’d seen me and Nellie together. The gossip would eventually get back to the Hartley sisters, thus ensuring our little plan to throw the Hartley sisters off our backs worked out.
Only now, our little plan was shot to shit. I mean, I’d not been serious to begin with about fake dating. I’d actually wanted this to be a real date as soon as she agreed to it—but now? Now, I didn’t know what to think.
One word kept echoing in my mind: Mine.
I felt like I was moving robotically as I pulled Nellie’s chair out for her. She sat, giving me a hesitant smile, like she knew I was still grappling with what she’d told me. I pulled out my own chair, sitting down heavily.
I’d handled it well enough initially, more concerned with how upset she was and wanting to make sure she understood I didn’t judge her. Not for a single minute.
Was I miffed that she’d been with someone else? Maybe a little, but again that had more to do with the greediness I felt toward her and less to do with her choices. I knew I was no saint. I had a track record a mile long, and it was a damn miracle I hadn’t had a scare like this before.
I’d been careful, my older brother’s experience with fatherhood reminding me to take that shit seriously. Raising kids as a single parent wasn’t easy. I’d watched how isolating it was for Damien, not having a teammate, a partner to help with the responsibilities and concerns. The girls’ birth mother had never been interested in parenting, so everything had always fallen on Damien, until Charlotte. In her, he found an equal partner, someone willing to help him carry the load of parenthood.
I’d never given much thought to kids myself, always telling myself that if I found the right person, maybe. But every time I thought back to that night I shared with Nellie, I couldn’t remember reaching for the box in my nightstand. I remembered heated, desperate kisses and touches, smudging her makeup around her mouth a little. Even still, she’d been a vision, those eyes captivating me—hooking me like ecstasy.
“Can I get you some of our house wine to start?” Gabrielle asked, jarring me from my thoughts. She looked between me and Nellie expectantly.
I floundered. My plan had been to order a bottle of wine to split between the two of us, but Nellie wouldn’t be drinking, and I should really refrain in solidarity or something…shouldn’t I?
“Is the winter lemonade good?” Nellie said after scanning the drink menu options.
“Oh, yes,” Gabrielle nodded her head, her brown eyes widening. “It’s made with blood oranges and cranberries. It’s got a bit of a punch-y taste to it. The cranberries give it a zing and the blood oranges add a sweet tanginess.”
“I’ll try that, please,” Nellie said. “Non-alcoholic, if that’s possible?”
“Sure is,” Gabrielle nodded, turning to look at me. “What about you, Noah? Whisky and Coke?”
I’d been there a time or two before, usually for staff holiday parties in The Loft, but I guess my drink of choice was known among our circles.
I glanced at Nellie, and she nodded, as if urging me to order whatever I wanted. Truthfully, I could use a drink. Maybe it would quiet the buzzing in my head. “Sure, yeah. That sounds great.”
“Great, I’ll be right back with your drinks,” Gabrielle said, heading off to the drink station.
Nellie bit her lip, watching Gabrielle go. “Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”
