The spell breaks. Caleb steps back, shoving his hands in his pockets. "We should probably..."
"Yeah." We're already moving toward the stairs. I need space, need air. I need to not be in this room with him anymore.
"Ten! Nine! Eight!"
The countdown echoes through the house, and everyone gathers in the main room. I find myself pressed against the wall, watching as everyone cheers and raises their drinks.
"Seven! Six! Five!"
Across the room, Caleb stands by himself, eyes fixed on me. The naked longing on his face makes my breath catch.
"Four! Three! Two!"
He turns away suddenly, slipping through the crowd toward the door. As he passes Gavin, the big guy squeezes his shoulder in silent support.
"ONE! HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
Cheers erupt, couples kiss, and solo cups smash together. I turn away from the celebrations. My throat closes up, that familiar ache spreading from sternum to stomach.Fuck.
My hand rubs against my chest. There it is, that hollow, scraped-out feeling like someone took a melon baller to my insides.
Around me, the party continues, but I notice the subtle divisions forming. Tyler checks on Caleb's empty spot with concern. Drew makes his way toward me, brow furrowed. Other brothers glance between us, clearly picking sides in a war no one wants to fight.
Drew catches me by the kitchen, concern written all over his face. "Everything's fine." The words come out on reflex: same lie, different day.
He doesn't believe me. I don't believe myself.
Emily appears beside Drew, her face flushed from dancing. She takes one look at me and her bright smile softens to something more understanding. "Oh, honey."
Before I can stop her, she pulls me into a hug. I stiffen at first, but something is nice about her arms. Drew's sympathetic gaze meets mine over her shoulder.
"I'm really okay," I mumble as she releases me.
Emily tilts her head, studying me with surprising perception beneath her bubbly exterior. "You know, it's a new year. Perfect time for fresh starts." She glances toward where Caleb had been standing. "Or second chances."
"Em," Drew warns gently, but she pats his chest.
"I'm saying. I've watched you two getting close. Whatever happened, it wasn't nothing."
Outside, fireworks burst against the night sky, marking the start of a new year. I see the colors explode and fade through the window, wondering if some breaks can't be mended, if some trust can never be rebuilt.
Emily squeezes my arm before Drew guides her back to the celebrations. My phone buzzes in my pocket. It's a text from Marcus at Rainbow Haven: "Happy New Year, kid. Remember what I always say, the things worth fighting for rarely come easy."
Fuck.Marcus and his perfectly timed wisdom. The text blurs a little. When did I become the coward here? Caleb came upstairs, faced me, and said the actual words. And what did I do? Shook his hand like we're business acquaintances.Friends.Jesus.
For all his faults, Caleb had been brave enough to find me tonight, apologize, and admit he was scared.
He didn't run. He stood there and admitted he was scared, and what did I do? Shook his hand like a fucking coward. Okay, so maybe second chances aren't complete bullshit after all.
I slip my phone back into my pocket, not ready to decide anything tonight. But for the first time since our breakup, I let myself consider the possibility that just maybe some breaks might be fixable with enough care and time.
I'm still looking for him in every room I walk into.
Caleb is worth fighting for.
Or this is what heartbreak looks like when you're too stubborn to let go.
It's a coin flip, really.
