My throat tightened, and I nodded. “I still feel shitty about it.”
“Maybe you need to talk to him.”
I winced. “Probably. But… not right now. Whatever’s going on in his mind…” I shook my head. “I should let him process some of it.”
“Maybe talking to you is what he needs to process it.”
Gnawing my lip, I didn’t respond.
Maureen sighed. “Look, only you can judge if it’s the right time, but I wouldn’t let this thing fester. You guys seem to have a good thing going—whether it’s friendship or the googly eyes you insist you’re not making whenever you think of him.”
I scoffed as some heat rushed into my face. “I do not make?—”
“Yes, you do. Don’t argue with me. Anyway, you seem to have a good thing going, whatever it is, so don’t let it get away because you’re too scared or stubborn to talk to him.” She paused. “I mean, I can see waiting until you’re back in Pittsburgh so you’re not stuck together.”
“We live together,” I reminded her.
“Right, but one of you can leave a bit more easily if you need some space. Out there, unless one of you gets a hotel or you rent a car, you’re kind of stuck until you’re back here.”
“True. Maybe we need to get out and do more tourist stuff. Break the funk a bit. Then we can talk.”
“Whatever helps. I think it’ll be worth the awkwardness when you do bring it up.”
“Probably.” She did have a point. Uncomfortable conversations were not my strong point, and I was terrible at initiating them, but it was usually worth it in the end.
We chatted a bit more, and then we ended the call. I drank in silence for a moment before heading back inside.
Eric was in the kitchen making himself a sandwich. When he glanced at me, a small smile curled his lips. “Hey. Did you want something to eat?”
“I’m good.” The words“maybe we should talk”dangled precariously on the tip of my tongue. Instead, I went with, “Think we should go do something tomorrow? So we don’t get cabin fever?”
“Sure.” He paused to spread some mayo on the bread. “You have anything in mind?”
“I saw an ATV rental place.” I hesitated, but suggested, “We could always try finding the moose again.”
As soon as those words brought Eric’s smile to life, I was sold. I didn’t care if it meant dragging my carcass out of bed at three in the morning—we were going moose-watching.
“One of the guides posted this morning that they saw several big bulls,” he said. “I think I know where they went, so we could give that spot a try.”
“Cool. Sounds great.” I smiled. “I’ll set an alarm.”
“I’ll make sure there’s coffee ready.”
We exchanged smiles, and then I headed upstairs to check my work email while he continued making his food. It was a start. We still needed to talk about some tough subjects, but he still wanted to go out and do stuff, and he wasn’t at all hostile toward me.
Step one, go have some fun and get out of our funk.
Step two…
Well, hopefully I’d work up the courage for that.
Because we definitely needed to talk.
CHAPTER 21
ERIC
After I finished my dinner, I wandered out to the dock for another smoke. I didn’t usually smoke this much even when I was on vacation, but my head was a goddamned mess. If nothing else, the weed slowed all my thoughts down enough that they wouldn’t overwhelm me. Or at least it made me stupid enough that most of those thoughts slipped away before I could make sense of them.
