He doesn’t say a fucking thing.
I blink at him, my tears falling faster now. “I’m going to walk out of here and get back to work. Then I’m going to try my best to wait until you make up your mind on where your heart is and what you can and can’t do without me. But Dex? I’m not waiting very long.”
Chapter 21
Julia pulls on the glass door to a trendy new bistro that opened a few weeks ago a few blocks from our apartment building. She drags me by the hand behind her. Inside, people stand shoulder to shoulder along the bar, laughing and talking. Immediately I want to walk back out.
She tightens her grip on my hand and scans the packed room. I mistakenly told her about my supply room kiss and the discussion that followed, and she’s now made it her life’s mission to erase all things Dex from my mind. She’s adamant being here tonight will help me get over Dex. She doesn’t understand I don’t want to get over him. I want Stephanie out of the picture and for us to get back together and go on like none of it ever happened. A sharp cramp slices through my stomach and I squeeze my eyes closed from the pain. I should have just stayed in bed all day.
“This way,” Jane says, tugging me along. “They have this romantic dining area that I keep hearing people talk about.”
What people?
I open my eyes just before a near collision with a voluptuous server carrying a platter of nachos and cheese fries, the scent of the overly greasy food killing whatever appetite I came in with, which was pretty much non-existent to begin with.
Julia leads me up a half-hidden staircase that opens into a second-floor landing, with a hostess station. Just behind her is a pair of intricately decorated French doors and an enormous dining area alight with flickering candles and enclosed booths for intimate dining. Julia speaks with the hostess and she shows us to a pre-set table with menus lying down in place of plates. I slid into the booth feeling oddly feverish from just looking at the quantity of candles that surround us. “This has got to be a fire hazard, no?”
“They’re just tiny lightbulbs, see,” the hostess says as she taps the pad of her index finger over one of the fake flames.
When she leaves, I become obsessed with playing with the candle.
“Are you okay? You’re acting weird.” Julia slides into the opposite side of the booth and unfolds her napkin.
“Exhausted. Physically and emotionally. I think I just need to stay in bed all day tomorrow,” I sigh, abandoning the glowing lights and rubbing my forehead. Even my head feels achy. Maybe I’m getting a cold.
“Thatisthe perfect Sunday plan.”
A server approaches us and sets down a basket of what smells like freshly baked bread and asks, “Would either of you like something to drink?”
We both order wine, but my stomach rolls at the thought of drinking it. I clear my throat and try to ignore my body telling me to tap out and go home. It’s just dinner. I’ll refuse anything else she has planned for after this.
“It’s charming, don’t you think? Romantic.”
I nod as I open the menu. My eyes scan over the choices quickly, the words and the dim lightning making me too dizzy to read. Sweat breaks out across my forehead. “I think I need to use the restroom and put some water on my face.” Another cramp stabs into my side and up through my core. “I hope they have a tampon dispenser in there.”
“Hmph,” she mumbles between bites of bread, holding up an index finger. “I have one. We are in perfect sync. I caught my Girl Flu this morning.”
She slides the tampon into my palm like a drug deal. “Code red. It’s Shark Week,” I laugh, as I slide out of the booth.
“I’ll wait until you come back to order,” she says, lifting the menu closer to her face. “It’s too dark in here to read this.”
I find my way to the bathroom and shoulder-open the door. Inside a pretty woman walks out of a stall, leaning her phone between her cheek and shoulder. She meets my gaze, but doesn’t return the friendly smile I offer. I sigh to myself and open an empty stall.
“Yeah, I know. You were right. He makes me feel like true love and fairytales do exist,” the girl says to someone on the other end of the phone conversation. “I’ve never been happier.”
Ugh. I want to ask her if she could spare some extra fairy dust for me and a friend. At least a swipe of a wand. Instead I shove a tampon into my crotch and thud my head against the stall wall, dying from cramps. It’s no wonder I’ve been feeling awful, there’s a damn crime scene in my pants. Thank God I had enough sense to wear a panty liner to dinner.Now, how fast can I eat to get out of here and crawl into my bed with a heating pad wrapped around my entire body?
I clean up my disaster and lurch out of the bathroom, lightheaded. Maybe we could get our dinner to go? Julia will understand. This feels too much like someone is grinding my insides into liquid, and I really want chocolate. It’s a perfectly horrible ending to a perfectly horrible week. I have found myself once again in love with someone who suddenly doesn’t belong to me anymore, someone who might be part of a family, and someone who I can’t seem to keep my hands off. I’ve distanced myself from my family, forgetting my parents for two whole weeks. And now, my period. I’m honestly not sure it can get much worse than this.
And then it does.
Karma was just sharpening her claws and finishing her drink, but she’s back now, leading me right out of the bathroom to find Dex and the woman from the bathroom living her own fairy tale having a romantic fake-candlelit dinner. I’m paralyzed.
The fairy princess leans over the table and whispers something into Dex’s ear, and he tilts his head closer to her and smiles, cheeks darkening. Is it me or is there an intensity to his eyes when he looks at her? Is he diving into her gaze, like a blind man’s searching for the sun? Does his stare look starved for all the secrets she holds deep inside her? Am I being too overly emotional? Seeing things that aren’t there.
No matter what my jealousy is telling me, the truth is he’s in a restaurant full of people and twinkling lights andme,and all he is looking at is her.
I’m in front of his table instantly. I have no recollection of walking there at all. “Dex?” I ask, my voice broken and trembling. My chest is so heavy I can’t find my breath, my body catches fire.
