He bolts up, eyes wide, slamming his hip into the table, and splashing whatever he was drinking all over the white lacy linen. The remnants of their dinner linger in crumbles and stains on their plates. In front of Stephanie sits a perfect piece of cheesecake covered in thin strips of raspberry syrup.Tell me this isn’t Stephanie,go ahead.Tell me you still love me. I want to hear him lie. “Nash?” His large frame struggles out of the booth, “What—what are you doing here?”
I whirl around in the direction of my table and point. Julia quickly slides down in her seat. Did she know? Did she bring me here to open my eyes? He’s not coming back to me. He’s not coming back. It’s really freaking over.
I can’t look at him. I still feel his kiss on my lips and I want to vomit, expel his touch from my memory. I laugh. It bursts out of me sounding vile and bitter. I lift my hand to slap him but stop myself before I do. I don’t want to feel his skin on mine. Instead, I spin around on the balls of my shoes and storm toward the pretty French doors. Julia’s head peeks up over the top of our booth, following me with her eyes.
I feel Dex right behind me, his hand gripping mine as I get to the second-floor landing. “Jane, wait. God, please.”
Oh, now I’m Jane and not just Nash. I pause, taking in a deep breath. I can’t wait to hear this. I twirl around and jam my hands on my hips. “Yes, please. Go ahead and tell me whatever you think will get me to understand this situation.”
His nose flares. His head shakes.
Fuck him.
“What am I supposed to do? She just had a baby, and maybe it’s mine. She needed a little time out and she’s a little depressed, so I just took her out to dinner. That’s it.”
I blink up at him. He could be telling the truth. Sure. But what about being on the phone with her friend sayingshe hasn’t been happier, and all that other true love fairy tale bullshit she yapped about. And the way he looked at her across the table. I choose to say nothing. My heart pounds in loud banging thuds through my body. My stomach muscles clench and squeeze and cramp and scream.
“Jane, I know you don’t want to hear this but I had a relationship once with her. We were serious and—"
“And you forgot how it ended?” She cheated on you!
“I didn’t forget. I don’t havethosefeelings for her, I just thinks she deserves to be treated like someone who might be the mother of my child. It’s you I love. I swear to God, Jane.”
“Really? Because she was just talking on the phone in the bathroom to someone about how he, meaning you, makes her feel like true love and fairytales do exist and how she’s never been happier.”
He actually has the audacity to look perplexed. “There’s no way she could have been talking about me.” His gaze drops to the floor, as if he’s trying to figure out who she might have been speaking about.
“Come on, Dex. I’m not stupid.”
“Yeah, and that’s one of the reasons I’m so fucking crazy about you, besides my obsession with your perfect ass.”
It’s official, I have whiplash. I need to walk out of this conversation right now and get as far away from him as possible so I can think myself straight again. I back away, toward the stairs. He watches me, confused again.
“Declan? Is everything okay?” Stephanie walks out onto the landing and smiles at me. Sure, she’s smiling now, but in the bathroom, she was too busy to return my smile. Jesus, I’m losing my mind. “Hello,” she says to me with a little jazz-hand wave.
Can she see I’m visibly shaking? That I feel flushed and agitated, and my cramps are ripping at my insides. My shoulders tingle with tension. I need to act human, be a decent person, show compassion. “Hi,” I sigh, pulling my lips between my teeth. “I’m Jane. Congratulations on the baby. Dex sent me a picture of her, she’s adorable.
Her smile is so big it brightens her entire face. She’s so pretty, it hurts to see her stand next to the man I love and know they may share a child.
“She’s everything,” she says, giving googly eyes to Dex. Then she looks back in my direction and tosses me a grenade, “I’m sorry, what did you same your name was, again? Jane? Do you and Declan work together?” Her eyes dart between the both of us. “How do you both know each other?” She reaches out and touches my arm like we’ve been friends for years. “You know men, they don’t talk about work, and he’s never mentioned a Jane.”
I look at Dex and his face is stark white and I know,I know, she’s telling the truth. She doesn’t know anything about me. In her mind we have no relationship. No past. No Netflix and chill. No photobooth fiasco. Nothing. In her world, I don’t exist.
Julia comes jogging through the French doors and skids to a halt, notices us all together, and slowly starts to back away.
I’m staring at Stephanie and Dex in utter disbelief. The room tilts and blurs. I don’t want to cry in front of Princess Stephanie. I wave my hand in Dex’s direction. “Oh, I’m no one special, believe me. We just once worked together on a big story. One of those once-in-a-lifetime jobs. But it’s over now.” I sidestep away from them and head for the stairs.
“Jane, no wait. Hold on—"
I stop at the top step and turn around. I look at both of them and wait. I wait for him to tell her who I am. But he doesn’t. I wait for him to finish his sentence. He doesn’t do that either. With a jerky nod, I jog down the stairs so fast they won’t be able to see my tears.
Outside the building, the air is cold and wet. It hurts my lungs to breathe. My heart is drumming too fast and I don’t feel well at all. My insides convulse and contract, threateningly.
“Oh my God,” Julia grabs onto my shoulders. “Jane, are you okay? He’s in there in growling at her. He’s telling her he loves you.”
I bend over and clutch my cramping stomach. “That’s something he should have done the minute she said she was having his baby and wanted to be back in a relationship with him. He should have said he wanted a paternity test and that he would love and cherish Olivia but he was already in a great relationship.” I look up at her from my weird position. “He never said any of that. She didn’t even know I existed until just now.”
“So, you’re just going to…?”
