“That is up to you.” He looked away. “Once you have done as promised, you will no longer be required to stay with me. I can arrange to have you housed at another property. You will be free.”
Thalia’s heart sank through the floor and the world turned around her. She let go of his hand and took a step back, nearly tripping because her knees shook so horribly. The floor rose, the ceiling collapsed, and it was all she could do to not burst into tears.
“Oh…” She sniffed and straightened, forcing a neutral expression on her face. “Is that… is that what you want?”
“Is it not what we agreed upon?”
It was like a knife plunging into her chest. She did her best not to show it, but she wasn’t so sure she managed. “I suppose it is.”
And there it was, the answer she had sought. But not the one she had wanted. Despite how Thalia felt, Caspian did not love her. By the sounds of it, he did not care about her at all.
She turned away because she could feel her eyes welling with tears.
“I should go…” She started across the foyer, desperate to be free from him.
“Thalia…” He called after her. She stopped but did not turn. Still, she hung onto the vein thread of hope that he might change his mind… “I will let you know what I plan, concerning Lord Donmere.”
“Do that,” she said without turning around. Then, a decision was made, one born from the moment. “If you need me, I will be at my brother’s home.”
“What?”
“Rosaline is staying there, I believe,” she said. “As is Laurent. They need me now, and I should be there for him.”
“You cannot go,” he said in shock. “What if word gets out? How will that look?”
“How will it look?” She laughed bitterly, bowing her head, letting her shoulders slump. “To be honest with you, Caspian, I really do not care.” And then, before he had a chance to say anything else, she strode across the foyer and out of the room.
It was only once she was free from her husband, tucked away in a random room of the manor, that she gave in to her emotions. She collapsed on the floor, she hugged her knees to her chest, and she wept as if the world was ending.
The world was ending…herworld. Caspian did not love her. And it was because she loved him the way that she did, that knowing the truth of his feelings hurt more than she could possibly bear.
Chapter Twenty-Four
“Iwas told you had returned.”
Thalia stiffened when she heard Damien’s voice. She had been expecting him to come and see her. She had known that he would be surprised. What she had not been sure of was his reaction. Would he be surprised? Would he be upset? Or would he be angry to see her?
Based off the coldness of his tone, one that sent a shudder up her spine so that she shook from it, Thalia knew now how he felt well enough. The question thus became, what was he going to do about it?
Thalia was standing in her bedroom, by the window, looking outside and across the back garden. She was transfixed by the simple beauty of the flower beds and hedges and orchids, how elegantly wonderous it was to behold. There was no ugliness in that garden. No chance of pain or hurt. It was beauty that existedfor the sole purpose of bringing happiness and giving life to those lucky enough to witness it.
What it must be like to be a rose in a garden. Not having to worry about what others think of you. Not having to care about love or happiness. To exist solely to give beauty, that even the cruelest of souls can look upon you and smile…
“Thalia?” Damien’s voice somehow turned colder, and it was sharp with warning. “What are you doing here?”
She still did not turn around, taking an extra moment to look upon the garden. She allowed a smile to touch her lips as she did, needing that final moment of peace before she broke.
Behind her, she could sense her brother’s anger. And while she understood well enough why he was upset with her, she prayed that for once he would look past expectations and see her for what she was: his sister. And as his sister, she needed him now more than ever.
“This is my home,” she said. “I had hoped that I might return when I wished it.”
“It was your home,” he corrected. She did not need to turn to know that he spoke to her from the doorway, as if there was a barrier keeping him from walking into the room. “And you have not answered my question. What are you doing here?”
“I need some time away from my husband,” she said, still without turning. “And I had hoped to spend it here. If that is not agreeable, I will go somewhere else. I only ask that you do not throw me to the street before I can find such a place.”
He groaned. “Of course I will not kick you to the street, Thalia. How you could think that I would…” He groaned again. “The question I am trying to ask iswhy. Why are you here?”
“I just told you. I need some time away from –”
