I heard groans and feminine giggles from one of the downstairs rooms, so I hurried up to my room.
I could feel an early onset hangover coming on, and the inside of my mouth tasted vile. I went in the bathroom and looked at my reflection. It wasn’t pretty, there was makeup running down my face, my hair bedraggled. As tired as I felt, I couldn’t go to bed like this. So I reached in and turned on the shower. Once I was clean, I’d hopefully be able to get some sleep.
I walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around me. So much had cracked open, and I was so confused about being here, wanting to go home. That brought up thoughts of Declan.
I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do about Declan right now. I wouldn’t be going back home any time soon. Was it right to continue lying to him? He didn’t deserve that. A part of me wanted to call and tell him the truth, let him know I’d been lying about who I am the whole time I’dknown him. It was something he deserved to hear in person, not over the phone.
I looked at the clock, it was close to midnight, which was early by Declan’s standards. I should wait until tomorrow, when I wasn’t so tired, or reeling from everything that happened.
Who was I kidding? The part of me looking for comfort, for something familiar made me want to hear the voice of someone I cared about, who knew nothing about what was going on in my fucked-up life.
I picked up the phone it rang three times.
And a breathy, sleepy female voice answered.
Chapter 17
What am I doing?
I asked myself that for a second time as I rounded the hall and hurried down the stairs. I didn’t know if I was asking why I was here or why was walking away. My head was telling me to get the hell out of this house. Too much time had passed, even though I now had the truth about what happened that night. We’re different people now. My damn heart was telling me something different. I’d gotten it so wrong that night.
I paused at the bottom of the stairs, in two minds again, hesitating just long enough for the door behind me to open and someone to step out.
“Hudson.”
The old lady’s house was usually quiet, not allowing any of the debauchery of the club house saw to spill over here. I hadn’t expected to run into anyone, especially this late.
“I’m glad you’re here. I was gonna look for you.”
“What is it Rosa?” I asked with a little impatience in my voice.
I’ve always liked Rosa. She and Ballistic had taken me in when my dad was at his lowest point. I’d lived with them for almost a year. She was a good wife to Ballistic and knew when to keep her mouth shut. I knew Ballistic told her things she shouldn’t know. A lot of the older guys withold ladies they’d been with for years often ended up telling their wives about club business.
Whether or not it was a rule, you’re in the life that long, with a loyal wife at home, it’s just natural that things come out. When it counted, Ballistic would keep his mouth shut. I was certain he didn’t tell Rosa anything about what went on in the Shed. Just like I intended to never discuss what went on there if I ever…
I cut those thoughts off. I would never have an old lady.
I hated King wanted to hold off and follow Waverley’s idea of revenge against Reinhart. All I wanted to do was rip the guy’s spinal column out through his fucking mouth and no one was letting me. I’d already had an angry run in with War about it. He’d clocked me in the jaw at one point and I’d had to rein myself in from retaliating. Our Prez had given a direct order and War wouldn’t let me go against that. I’d made the mistake of asking how he could let shit like that go against his own sister, hence the punch. Of course, he wasn’t happy, but he could control it better, clearly.
I just wanted to get out of here, but Rosa had different ideas. Her eyes narrowed at the tone of my voice, but she tilted her head, indicating I follow her to the kitchen. I stood in the hallway with my hands on my hips, tipping my head down to look at my feet. I didn’t have to follow her. I didn’t have to do anything a woman in the club said, but I had more respect than that. Rosa was the person Waverley turned to all those years ago and I could ask what happened that night.
When I entered the kitchen, she was pouring boiling water into two mugs.
“Really?” I arched a brow.
“Hush, sit your ass down,” she pointed at the large kitchen table.
I bristled but let out a heavy sigh. There was no point arguing and sat my ass down. She put the steaming mug in front of me. I looked at the murky brown water and gave it a sniff. Rosa scoffed as she folded her slight frame into the chair.
“It’s chamomile. Good for calming the mind.”
“I’m calm,” I muttered.
“Uh huh,” she eyed me. She was too perceptive for my liking. Rosa took a sip of her tea and made a hmm sound.
“Rosa, I don’t have all night.”
“What are you doing here?” she asked.
