Fuck, please tell me I didn’t do what I think I did last night.
“Calm down, Lucas. I can see your eyes bugging out of your head. I ran into you at Shamrock's last night. You were at the bar, drunk off your ass, and got into an argument with the bartender because you wouldn’t leave after last call. I got your address off your license in your wallet and walked you home. Miraculously, we made it up the stairs before you passed out on the couch. I slept on the other side of the sofa since it was so late. I figured you wouldn’t mind.”
I was grateful I’d woken up at home and not on the street, but if Sam ever found out Nicole stayed here overnight, she would lose it. I still thought of us as together, because I couldn’t consider the alternative. Not knowing what happened between her and Marc last night was killing me.
“Thanks for doing that. I was out trying to forget something.”
“Trying to forget Sam? Sorry Luc, even as drunk as you got, that didn’t happen. All the way back here, all I heard over and over was how beautiful she was, how much you loved her, how could she buy, I think you said ‘Marc’s bullshit.’ Before I pulled you out of the bar, you started to cry about how much you needed her. I felt awful for you.”
I must have been a real fucking sight last night. I needed coffee badly. I staggered into the kitchen and bumped into Nicole, making her spill coffee all over my shirt. I wasn’t fully awake yet, and still wobbly. The room was starting to spin.
“Sorry, Lucas. I saw you had a Keurig, so I helped myself. Would you mind if I took a shower before I left?” I hoped I looked pathetic enough last night to discourage her from trying anything. She did get me home, so I didn’t want to be rude. But I needed to talk to Sam, and Nicole needed to be out of here.
“Sure. There are towels behind the door. I need to leave soon, so I’m going to have to ask you to make it quick.” My phone was coming back to life, and I could hear it blowing up.
“No problem. Thanks!” She ran into the bathroom, and I walked back into the kitchen.
I took off my coffee-stained shirt and threw it on the back of one of the kitchen chairs. I rubbed my temples to ward off the pain. Last night was not my finest hour. I felt awful for the way I left Sam’s house, but I was angry. When it came to her, I didn’t think rationally. I was all caveman where she was concerned, and I wanted to beat Marc senseless for even thinking he could come back to her.
I heard a knock at the door and walked my heavy legs over to answer it. I opened the door, and there she was—Sam.
We had a couple of moments of awkward silence before she asked if she could come in. I moved out of the way to let her enter, and my breath caught as she took off her coat. She was wearing my favorite dress. I loved the way she looked in it so much that whenever she wore it, it was always a matter of time before I had it crumpled on the floor or pulled up to her neck.
Sam reached into her purse, and she handed me an envelope. I opened it and unfolded the papers inside. My eyesight wasn’t the best in my hungover state, but could make out names—Marc Andrew Christensen, Samantha Elizabeth O’Rourke, Isabella Rose Christensen. I skimmed through the rest of them and got to the last page, where I saw two signatures and dates.
My weary eyes met Sam’s beaming ones, and a flood of relief made my shoulders slump.
“My signed divorce papers. Marc finally did it! I’m free! And I’m—wellwe’re—all yours. That is, if you still want us …”
Sam was all I ever wanted, and she finally belonged tome, without anything or anyone standing in my way. I ran over to her and kissed her. Sam giggled as I scooped her up, and she wrapped her legs around my waist.
“Luc, I think your hot water shut off—Oh, sorry!”
I was so happy, I forgot to mention to my girlfriend that there was a woman in my shower. My hot water did turn on and off at times, but I got the feeling she came out in a towel with an ulterior motive—to try to entice me to do something. That would never have happened; the only woman in the world for me was already in my arms.
Sam’s entire body went rigid as she glared between Nicole and me. I could tell right away what conclusion she’d come to. The look on her face said it all like her heart had broken right in half.
I closed my eyes and put her down. I would tell her the truth, and she would believe me—she had to.
“Sam, I know this looks really bad, but it’s not—”
“Did she sleep here, Lucas?” Her voice was cold, and it scared me.
I took a deep breath, praying the day I finally gotallof her wouldn’t be the same day I lost her.
“Yes, but we didn’t—”
I didn’t even get to finish the sentence as she bolted out the door. Whatever I said, or pleading I did, to make her believe me, would be useless—but I still went after her. She couldn’t leave. I couldn’t lose her. Not now—not when we finally had everything.
When I caught up to her outside, I noticed her big, sad eyes— the same eyes she had at the bar all those months ago. She looked at me like I was no better than Marc. Couldn’t she see how much I fucking adored her? How much I needed her? No, this wasnothappening. I wouldn’t accept it.
Samantha hailed a cab coming up the block. She started to walk over, and I grabbed her arm.
“You can’t leave like this.” I panicked. I was afraid if I let go of her arm, she would disappear forever. “I need you; I love you. Youknowme, Sam.”
She shook her head. “No. No, I don’t.” I saw the tears roll down her face. I wanted to wipe them away and fix this.Why wouldn’t she fucking let me?I couldn’t picture a future without her and Bella. My girls were slipping right through my fingers, and there wasn’t a goddamn thing I could do about it. Sam told me in a small voice to let her go, and I snapped.
“No!” My own tears streamed down my cheeks as the horror of losing the only woman I’d ever loved sunk in.
