Evan
When I came backinto the waiting room, my stomach was in knots. Paige had enough to deal with right now; a brain infection was the last thing she needed. I was relieved she was mine again, but terrified. It was excruciating to watch the one I loved too weak to speak in a complete sentence.
Tess and John turned at the sound of my footsteps. We were the only ones in the waiting room since it was after visiting hours.
“She’s okay for now. They’re doing the lumbar puncture and we can go back in after fifteen minutes.” I plopped in a chair next to Tess and leaned my head back as I rubbed my eyes.
“Ellie said to text her. She had to go home to the baby.”
I nodded and leaned forward, my elbows on my knees.
“I need to ask you both something.” I looked between Tess and John.
“Once Paige comes home, I want to marry her. I’d like your permission.” Wasting time made no sense. All I wanted was to take Paige home and make her mine, permanently. The weeks we’d spent apart only made me that much surer.
Tess gave me a watery smile before she grabbed my hand and squeezed.
“Of course, you can.” She gazed back at John and laughed. “If it makes you feel better, you can say yes on Alex’s behalf.”
John smirked as he shook his head at her.
“You have my permission, and you’d have my brother’s if he were here.” John put his hand on my shoulder. “Let me go call Marie and give her an update.” John squeezed my arm as he headed into the hallway.
“Paige was the apple of her father’s eye.” Tess let out a long sigh. “I hate that she doesn’t remember him. He was sure that she was a boy, even referred to her as Alex Junior for most of my pregnancy.” She coughed out a laugh. “I’d already said I wanted Paige as the name for a girl, but he was so certain, he shrugged me off. I suggested Alexandria as her middle name when she was born because I was afraid he was disappointed, but the second he saw her he was in love. This is the same hospital he died in.” She swallowed as she stared into space.
“So, from the time she was fourteen months old, I had to be motherandfather. I was always tough on her, but she was too giving and trusting. Always let people get the best of her. I tried to toughen her up. And now look what I’ve done? She was sick all that time and afraid to tell me. I practically had to force her.” Tess dropped her face to her hands as she cried. I wrapped my arm around her and rubbed her shoulder.
“Speaking as someone who lost both my parents the day I lost one, I think you’re an amazing mother. And so does Paige. She kept it from all of us because she thought she could fix herself and not worry us. You didn’t do anything but prove how much you loved your daughter every single day. You have nothing to feel bad about.” I gave her a wink when she lifted her head and drew out a chuckle.
“You’re a good son-in-law already.” I laughed as her head fell onto my shoulder.
“Excuse me, ma’am. You’re Paige Taylor’s mother?”
I recognized one of the doctors that came into Paige’s room with Dr. Stephens.
“Yes, how did the lumbar puncture go?”
“Dr. Stephens is still prepping for the procedure. This is a DNR form in case we need to put her on a respirator. Since you are acting as your daughter’s health care proxy, you would be the one to sign it.”
My own breathing caught in my throat as my heart pounded in my ears.
“DNR? Does that mean what I think it means?”
John came back into the waiting room and put his hand on my shoulder as my blood ran cold. A doctor was asking Tess to sign a Do Not Resuscitate order for Paige.
“We’ll watch her tonight and see how she does but we need your permission in case we need to intubate. Some families are very vocal about not wanting extreme measures when a loved one is already so sick—”
The room started to spin. This couldn’t be happening. I looked up at John, silently pleading for him to tell me that I had heard wrong, that Paige wasn’t sick enough for a doctor to ask Tess if they should keep her alive or not.
“John . . .” My voice quivered as shock jolted through my system. “I . . . I just got her back . . . she said she wanted to marry me. We . . . I was going to take her home . . . I can’t lose her. They can’t just let her go . . .” Tears pricked my eyelids and John wrapped his arm around me.
This wasn’t the first time John had seen me breakdown. When I was seventeen, my father wound up in the hospital for alcohol poisoning after he almost killed a family with his car. The shame plus the anguish of never knowing when my father would turn up dead became too much to bear.
Just like all those years ago, John didn’t lie and say everything would be okay. He nodded, saying, “I know, son. I know.”
Tess shoved the form into the doctor’s chest while she leveling him with a murderous glare.
“We won’t need this, so you can take it back. My daughter isn’t a hopeless case. She’ll get better. She just needs to get through this.”
