“Because you deserve better than what I can give you. Don’t feel guilty, I want you to have a good life. Find someone who can give you all the things I can’t.”
“The only thing I want in life is you. No one else can give me that.” I smoothed the matted hair away from her forehead and kissed her temple.
“You told me you wanted a ton of kids.” Paige gasped to catch her breath. “If my kidneys don’t get better, they could fail. And I may not be able to have children. I saw you with Lucas’s kids, and how great you are with Jack. You should have that. If I’d told you the truth, you never would have left me. You would have given up what you really wanted without a second thought…” Paige took a deep wheezing breath. “You’re wonderful that way. I couldn’t let you sacrifice the life you wanted because of me . . . so I acted like a nasty bitch . . . so you wouldn’t want me anymore.” Paige’s chest heaved as her voice cracked.
I picked up her hand and held it between mine. I kissed her palm, and then each finger. “Didn’t work. I still only wantyou.” I narrowed my eyes. She bit her lip and let out an audible heavy sigh.
“You’ve taken care of everyone your entire life, and thought of yourself last. Your dad, Jack. You never really did what you wanted or lived your life for you . . . I can’t do this to you. You deserve better—what are you doing?”
I lowered the side rail on the far side of the bed. Careful not to mess with her IVs or oxygen, I climbed into the bed and wrapped my arm around her waist. Paige buried her head into my chest as her weak shoulders shook from sobs.
“Hey.” I tapped my finger under her chin. She lifted her teary gaze to mine. “Do you love me?”
Paige nodded as her jaw quivered. “Yes. Always.”
The side of my mouth turned up in a smirk. “So we’re not going too fast, after all?”
A tiny smile curved her lips before she shook her head.
“I’d marry you tomorrow if I could.” Her weak hand cupped my cheek.
I turned my head to kiss her palm and reached up to run my thumb along her wrist.
“I’d love to marry you. We just need to get you out of here first. Plus, I need to propose the right way.” I ran my hand down her cheek. She shut her eyes as she leaned into my touch.
“Or finish proposing . . .”
I pulled her closer as she giggled through her tears.
“Picked up on that, did you?” Paige nodded as she snuggled into my chest.
“Maybe a couple of times . . .” I kissed her forehead and put my finger under her chin so she could look at me.
“I only want you. Everything else would be nice to have, but Ineedthe woman I’ve been in love with for most of my life. I want a life with you, whatever it entails. I’m not going anywhere. I love you too much to live without you. So no more lies, okay?”
“Okay.” Paige gave me a light peck on the lips. I kissed her back as her whole body relaxed in my arms.
“I’m still really mad at you.”
She nodded. “I know.”
“You have a lot to make up to me. When you feel better we’re going to have insane, off the charts, make up sex.” Paige laughed around the oxygen filtering through her nose. I pulled her head into my chest again and rocked her back and forth. I sangAll My Lovingin her ear, and she collapsed in sobs before I got through even the first few lines. All my loving was for her, and it always would be. “And when I propose,” I whispered in her ear, “you’ll know.”
“Does your heartbeat still say ‘Daisy’?” Paige’s voice was scratchy and weak. Our conversation had zapped all her energy.
I kissed her forehead. “It’ll say ‘Daisy’ until it stops beating.” She pressed a light kiss to my chest as her heavy breathing evened out.
“Paige, it’s time for the lumbar puncture.” Dr. Stephens walked in with two other doctors behind her and turned to face me. I expected to get scolded for lying in bed with her.
“You’ll have to wait outside. Should take about fifteen minutes. I made sure your name was on the list so you won’t have a problem coming back in.”
“Thank you.” I carefully stood from the bed and leaned in to give Paige a light peck on the lips. “I’ll be right outside, Daisy.”
“Okay. I love you, babe.” Her eyes shut as she drifted off to sleep.
“I love you, too.” I wasn’t sure if she heard me, but I took consolation that maybe now, finally, she knew.
Thirty-Eight
