Tess turned her head to look at me, giving me a resolute nod. The doctor grumbled as he scurried away. Tess knelt on the floor by John and me, and took my face in her hands.
“No one is telling us to give up. I promise you that. She’s going to walk out of here and you’re going to marry her. Cheer up, cookie.” She kissed my cheek.
Paige once told me that her mother had the annoying habit of always being right. I closed my eyes and prayed my hardest that was still true.
Thirty-Nine
Paige
“Okay, Paige.”Dr. Stephens spoke in a low voice as she helped me turn on my stomach. “We’ll give you some lidocaine so you won’t feel anything. Should be very quick. You can go back to sleep if you want.”
I let my heavy eyelids close and saw Evan. I let him go, but he came back. The memory of his voice made me relax. I was so exhausted, I hardly gave a second thought to the big needle they planned to inject into my spine. I rested my head on my hands and floated off into a strangely peaceful sleep.
“God, you’re an idiot.”
I lifted my head and found Jack sitting next to my hospital bed. He crossed his legs as he leaned back, shaking his head at me.
“Oh my God. I’m dead, aren’t I?” I was glad to see Jack, but panicked. I wasn’t ready to go yet. I couldn’t leave Evan and my mother.
“No, not dead. Just an idiot.” He smirked as I glared at him.
“Yeah, you said that.”
Jack snickered at me as he folded his arms.
“Well, it was worth repeating. You let yourself almost die before you told anyone you were sick. Stubborn fucking mule, as usual.”
“I didn’t know ghosts could curse. Can you walk through walls?”
“Working up to that. You really want to see me do tricks?”
“No, I want to see you alive. I miss you so much. I felt so alone…”
“You were never alone, I was always here with you. Like I said I would be. Life doesn’t always turn out the way you want, cuz. It’s like poker. You need to play the hand you’re dealt and not feel sorry for yourself because you didn’t get better cards. You need to take the support from the people you love and tell lupus to go fuck itself. You’re tougher than you think. You can ride this out and still have a good, long life. Maybe not the one you planned for, but we don’t plan our lives, Paige. It’s stupid to even try.”
“Is heaven nice? How are Grandma and Grandpa?”
“Very nice. They’re both pissed at you. Uncle Alex, too.”
“What’s my dad like?” A slow smile spread across Jack’s face.
“As cool as my dad said he would be. Now, no more of this bullshit. You’re a crap liar so stop stressing yourself out trying.”
“I love you, Jack.” I smiled as he laughed at me.
“I love you, too. Pain in the ass.”
* * *
“Hey,she’s waking up. Paige? Hey, sweetheart! Does it hurt?”
My mother’s voice sounded far away as my eyes fluttered open. I squinted at her and at Evan standing behind her. I tried to pull myself up, but winced at the sting in my lower back. The pain medicine must have worn off.
Evan kissed my forehead and picked up my hand. “Hey, Daisy! How’s my girl?” I smiled as he brought his lips to the back of my wrist.
“Okay. I saw Jack. He called me an idiot.”
“Sounds like Jack. And I would agree with that.” I wiggled my hand out of Evan’s grasp to touch his cheek.
