She dismounted in a little green glade, knelt down in the wet grass, and began plucking individual clover weeds. The stems and leaves would be crushed up separately and used in different pastes. Her hood, dampened by the rain, hung heavily over her forehead, almost hanging in her eyes, and she eventually pushed it impatiently back. It was much colder without her hood, especially while scrabbling on the cold earth, but there was nothing to be done about that. Senga was used to cold.
Her mind whirled as she worked.
He said he would not humiliate Brendan by correcting him in public, but he’s so loyal to the man. What if he won’t correcthim in private, either? What if Brendan wants him to marry this woman?
That thought sent a rush of nausea through her. From what Senga knew of Brendan, he would never make anybody enter into a marriage that they did not want. But then what if Noah didn’t express how unhappy he was with the marriage?
What if he isn’t unhappy?
That was a thought she could not bear. Not now. Not after all they’d been through. It was possible that Brendan could assume that he knew Noah well enough to know what he’d want, and once the marriage was organized, it would be dangerous to call it off. There was no sense in offending a clan. And the clanwouldbe offended if Clan Grahame agreed to a marriage alliance then backed out again so quickly.
Noah might not risk backing out. He might feel as though he has to go through with the marriage. And then what? Where would that leave me? What would I do next?
Biting her lower lip hard, Senga rested her hands on her knees, breathing in deeply through her mouth. She should have eaten before leaving. She briefly considered searching for some mushrooms and berries to eat. There’d be something, enough to stave off the gnawing in her stomach.
As she looked around, she heard something rustling in the bushes behind her. Senga froze, ice sweeping through her veins. The ridiculousness of her situation—the situation she had put herself in, of course—hit her like a fall from a horse, knocking the wind out of her.
What have I done? If my father had the Keep watched before, of course he has men all around watching it now.
She rose slowly to her feet, reaching for her herb knife. It wasn’t much, but it was sharp, and the well-worn bone handle felt right in her palm. At a pinch, it would slash and stab, although the blade was so short she would have to getright upagainst her opponent. That thought made her feel sicker than before, although of course that could be her hunger and lack of food.
I’m a fool, but I hope not to be a dead fool any time soon.
A twig cracked in the undergrowth, making her flinch.
“Who’s there?” she called, her voice cracking. “What do ye want?”
Bluebell briefly lifted her head, momentarily distracted from eating grass, as the bushes rustled behind her. It occurred to her that this was the time of day that bears and wolves might be out hunting.
Well, this is how I die,Senga thought miserably.Not in battle, not at the hands of Laird Dickson or my own father. No, I will die because of my own stupidity.
Wonderful…
A man stepped out of the dripping undergrowth, shaking raindrops from his cloak, and Senga let out a gasping breath, nearly dropping her knife.
“Noah,” she breathed. “It’s ye.”
“Of course it is me,” he responded tightly.
She blinked rain out of her eyes, wiping the back of her hand across her forehead. “Ye followed me. Why did ye follow me?”
He held his arms out to the sides. “Because somebody had to, Senga! What were ye thinking, coming out here alone?”
“We need herbs.”
“Aye, then come with soldiers! Look, enough talk. Let’s just get back inside, aye?”
She swallowed, biting the inside of her cheek. The stubborn part of her wanted to insist upon finishing her task of gathering the necessary herbs, but she could see how that would be foolish.
“I would have thought it would be easier for ye if ye lost me in the woods,” she responded at last. “Ye could be married off without guilt.”
He blanched. “How dare ye say that to me, Senga? Howcouldye? Ye truly believe I wanted to marry that woman? I do not even know what she looks like.”
“I bet she is beautiful,” Senga muttered, folding her arms. She could hear the petulance in her own voice and knew, in her heart, that she was being foolish. Foolish andunkind.
Noah took a step towards her, his hands inching out as though he wanted to lay them on her shoulders. He stopped himself, however, and his arms fell down by his sides.
“It would not matter if she was a goddess walking on earth,” Noah said quietly, his voice catching a little. “She is not ye, Senga. I’ve not loved a woman since I lost ye, and I do not believe I could ever love one again.”
