She squeezed her eyes shut, passing a hand over her face.
“Ye are a dutiful man,” she whispered. “And ye care so much for Brendan. If ye asked ye to marry that woman, ye would do it, wouldn’t ye?”
“Brendan would never ask that of me.”
“That is not my question.”
There was a silence after that. The rain began to fall, just gently at first, but Senga knew from experience that it would fall more heavily soon. The sound of pattering raindrops on foliage echoed all around them, and Senga found herself wearily assuming that she was going to get soaking wet once more.
Dry clothes really are a luxury for me right now.
“I would obey my Laird,” Noah said slowly, frowning down at her. “I can offer my loyalty freely because I know that Brendan would never force me to marry a woman I did not want. I don’t know how to convince ye of that. What do ye want from me?”
She placed her hands over her eyes, groaning aloud. “I don’t know, I don’tknow. I just… I feel as though I am losing ye again. I feel as though ye are abandoning me.”
“Senga, I would never…”
He broke off the end of that sentence, probably because they both knew very well that hehadabandoned her. Oh, he hadn’t meant it, she knew that, but still, the reality of it hung between them, heavy in the air like a bad smell.
“It’s as though I am constantly losing ye to some laird or another,” Senga whispered.
It felt as though the trees around her were growing taller, the foliage deeper. The world was growing, and she was shrinking. The world was changing, and she simply could not change with it. She’d tried, but no matter how hard she worked, the world moved on and left her behind.
Or so it felt.
She removed her hands, glancing listlessly up at the man she loved. He stared down at her, a frown between his brows. She could almost feel him straining at the bit to understand her, longing for her to explain. She wished she could find the words.
At that moment, a thought occurred to her.
“Where is yer horse?”
“Oh, my horse? I didn’t bring one.”
“Ye didn’tbring a horse?”
He shrugged. “I came out of the castle in time to see ye riding off through the gate on Bluebell here. I panicked and set off after ye at a run. I thought I had better see which way ye went. I watched ye crest the hill and slow down and guessed that ye planned to collect herbs or something equally silly. So, I ran. I ran, and here I am.”
She stared up at him, a lump forming in her throat.
“I want ye to tell me, here and now,” she murmured, her voice seeming to stick around her teeth. “What is it that ye want?”
Noah gave a harsh laugh. “What is it that ye think I want? Do I look like a man who has moved on from loving ye, Senga? No! I told myself for years that I did not care for ye. I made myselfbelieve it, ye know. Then the moment I saw ye again, it all came crashing down. Ye know, I think that even if ye had betrayed me, as I once believed, I would have still forgiven ye. Can ye believe it? I would have forgiven ye anything.”
A warm raindrop rolled down Senga’s cheek, and it took her a minute to realize that it was a tear.
“Ye mean it?” she whispered.
He nodded. “My heart is yers, lass. Always has been, always will be.”
She dove forward, fisting her hands in the damp material of his cloak, and pulled him towards her. She kissed him, their lips slick with rainwater and mist, tasting fresh and green.
“Don’t marry anyone else,” she breathed, pulling apart. “Marryme, Noah. I want yer past, yer future, yer now,everything.”
He closed his eyes, a faint smile sliding across his lips. “Then let’s have a handfasting ceremony.”
She nodded eagerly. “Aye, I’d like that.”
He kissed her again, wrapping his arms around her shoulders.
