He opens his door and stands with his hand on the frame. “Goodnight, Liz.”
“Finn, please, let me explain—”
“I think you said all you needed to say the night you left me. Goodnight.”
I slowly step into the hall and he closes his door behind me.
Once I’m inside my room, I gaze at my bed and think of climbing under the covers and crying myself to sleep. But I won’t. I’m not going to cry and tell myself what I think I need to hear to make it okay. That was the old me. I screwed up and now I have to make it right. I need to show Finn the new me. I have changed.
I don’t want to be alone anymore. I want a car full of people. I want to sing songs and talk about my day. I want to fall asleep in his arms and wake up to his smile. I changed because I didn’t know what was missing. He showed me what more meant and now I can’t live without it. I won’t.
I thought I was happy before I met him. But that was just a story I told myself. I told myself a lot of stories.
Walking to my bag, I pull out my blue notebook. I know just how I’m going to prove to him that he’s wrong. I do need him. I needed him before I ever met him. I have to show him that I haven’t been running from him. I’ve been running from me. This notebook will be my confession.
