I stood there, still, for a moment before speaking into his chest. “Cole, please take me home.” I felt his body stiffen, and I knew we’d never be the same.
* * *
Sully
The truck bumped over the last intersection in the country before we hit the city limits of Highland Falls as I headed on autopilot to Maggie’s duplex. She hadn’t spoken for the entire ten-minute ride into town. At one point I’d even put on some Pantera, knowing that typically she’d give me shit for listening to what she called screaming metal, but there’d been no reaction.
Fuck.
I hated leaving her like this. But maybe she just needed some breathing room. I knew Maggie. She wasn’t afraid of anything. She worked things through in her own time, processed her options, and moved on. She hated being pressured into conversations or making choices before she needed to. I just had to trust our friendship, trust our foundation, and let her process our morning.
I just couldn’t figure out why she was so freaked. As I drove down the streets bringing us closer and closer to her place, I went over the morning again. She said she knew we’d been safe. She was on the pill. She’d wanted the same thing, so what happened? Unless maybe she’d decided she didn’t want more with me? But we’d lit the bed on fire. That wasn’t it, right?
I braked to a stop in her driveway and turned off the truck. Reaching for the door handle, As Maggie reached for the door handle, her voice cut through the silence. “Sully, you don’t need to walk me up.”
I looked over at her. “What? Of course I do.”
Her tearful face looked determined. Inwardly, I groaned. I knew that determination well, and it meant I was truly fucked right now. Maggie would be listening to Maggie and no one else.
She took a deep breath. “Sully, thanks for looking out for me last night. And this morning was, well, amazing. But I think we’re better off as friends. I appreciate the ride home.” She turned to open her door.
“Are you out of your damn mind?” I growled. Her face registered her shock as she turned back toward me. Not my finest moment, but no. We weren’t doing this.
“Maggie, I have no idea what’s going through your brain right now because, I will note, you won’t tell me. But we didn’t just meet. I know you. I’ve known you since you were eight years old. I know you won’t hear a damn thing I say right now, but hear this. I won’t stop you from leaving me out here even though it’s the last thing I want. I know you need to go think through whatever is spinning in that gorgeous brain of yours. But after a little bit of time, we’re talking this through because before that damn piece of plastic decided to fuck with our morning, we were right where I’ve wanted us to befor years, and I’ll be damned if I’m letting that go for much longer, babe.” Well, I guess I was just laying it all out there this morning. I looked over her face as her eyes narrowed.
“Cole Sullivan,” she practically growled. “I am no longer that eight-year-old girl who did whatever you said. If I say we’re going to go back to being friends, then that’s what happening,babe. So you’re just going to have to deal with it.” And with that, she slid out of the truck and slammed the door. I watched her vibrating with energy as she marched up the walk to her back door. Unlocking the door, she went in without a backward glance, and I could hear the door slam from there in the truck. Groaning, I let my head drop to the steering wheel. Why had I thought anything with Maggie would be simple? I thought ahead to the bike trip Jake and I were taking in three weeks to check out some Midwest breweries and their canning operations. Maybe it would be better for all of us if I moved it up to give her a little space.
What a fucking mess.
2
When the Shit Hits the Fan
Five weeks later
Maggie
My head throbbed as I leaned against the cool tile of the staff bathroom wall. Jesus take the wheel. I glanced up, ensuring I’d locked the door and wouldn’t be interrupted. Privacy was required for this potential meltdown.
It had been a long day—middle school, during the last weeks of May, and only five days left of the school year all came together for a special brand of crazy.Deep breaths, I told myself. My heart raced as I looked in the mirror. The relaxation breathing that Emma and I had practiced in yoga came back.
Breathe in, two, three, four; out, two, three, four.
Closing my eyes, I tried to gather some courage. I had this. I was fine. In just a week I would have a summer stretching before me and my biggest concern would be where I wanted to travel first. My lease expired on my duplex in the fall, but I had arranged for a sublet starting at the beginning of summer and couldn’t get in my new place until August first. My road trip across the country was keeping me going right now. Stopping when I wanted to rest, read, relax, or experience someplace new. Breathing deep, I daydreamed of mountains and/or oceans. I had this. I just needed to get the hell out of Highland Falls.
Opening my eyes, I glanced down at the pregnancy test on the edge of the sink. Blinking once, I tried to focus my eyes and blinked again.
Holy fucking shit.
Quickly, I grabbed the box and looked at the back once again, telling myself that two lines surely meant you were clear, not pregnant. Right? I mean, it was once. Who gets pregnant due to one accident?
Get a grip, Maggie, I told myself. Apparently, you can get pregnant the one time you had unprotected sex. This was, after all, the textbook definition of what happens when you have an accident. They might as well as plaster my face into the Sex Ed PowerPoints about safe sex. That would be a lesson for the kids, their former middle school teacher knocked up.
My heart started pounding, and I could feel the panic building. I began feeling clammy, and a glance in the mirror showed my skin was a bit paler than was typical. Terrific. I didn’t need my first act as a cognizant mother to be passing out and whacking my head on the ground.
Not giving the first shit about the fact that I was in the staff bathroom, I slid to the floor, putting my head between my knees, and worked on breathing some more. Saying a quick word of thanks for our amazing janitor, Larry, the pride he took in our school, and floors that were blessedly clean, I worked on breathing in through my nose, out through my mouth.Get yourself together, Jameson.
One of my strengths was being able to quickly assess a situation and develop a plan of action. This came in tremendously handy as a teacher to adolescents who were going through puberty. It was also a great trait to have while sitting on the floor of a bathroom, pregnant and not married. Hell, not married didn’t even touch it. Not in a relationship would be more accurate. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
