She’d got me good.
I stepped forward, opened my arms then wrapped them around her.
We both cried, the sound of our emotional sobs echoing around the room.
‘I love you, Halle,’ I whispered.‘I willalwayslove you.You are the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.I really wish things were different.Know that if they were, I’d be with you in a heartbeat.’
We held each other for a few more minutes, before she slowly pulled away.
When I looked at Halle, her eyes were red rimmed and her cheeks were stained with tears.
Seeing her cry and not being able to do anything to make it stop was like having a machete thrust straight into my heart.
I wiped her cheeks with my thumb, still trying to stop my own tears from falling.
I wasn’t embarrassed to show my emotions.There was nothing wrong with a man crying.We hurt, we felt, we broke, just like women did.But I knew that I had to leave, because if I didn’t, I’d make things harder.For both of us.
I leant forward and gently pressed my lips on hers.
My cell buzzed.I ignored it.
‘You should get that,’ she said softly.
‘I… it’s not important.’
‘No, it’s fine.’
I sighed and reached in my pocket.
‘It’s… it’s the driver.He’s at reception.’
‘So, I suppose this is goodbye?’ she said, her voice cracking.
‘I… I guess so.’ We stared at each other in silence, seconds then minutes elapsing, both of us finding it impossible to break each other’s gaze.
When my cell buzzed a second, then a third time, I knew I had to be the one to rip off the band-aid.
‘Bye, Smiley.’ I kissed her forehead softly.‘Don’t give up on doing those amazing nails and take good care of yourself.I love you,’ I said, picking up my suitcase before walking away and feeling my heart shatter into a million pieces.
45
HALLE
As I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, I wondered whether I should plaster on another layer of concealer to hide the dark circles under my eyes.
I’d already put on two layers and although it was marginally better, I still looked like shit.
The past six days had been tough.
My last long-term relationship lasted for four years and the break-up was brutal.But although I’d only known Jake for two weeks and we were never officially dating, this felt harder.
When he’d left last Saturday, I’d stumbled out of the villa in a daze.Somehow I’d managed to muster up a half smile and mutter my thanks to Sammie when she came to say goodbye.But that was all.She’d asked how it went with Jake and all I could do was shake my head before I got into the car.
I was in shock.
I really thought I’d found the perfect solution.We’d stay together and he’d have a roof over his head to help him get back on his feet.Clearly I was wrong.
I’d fought back my tears during the flight, but once I was in the safety of my apartment, they came and didn’t stop.I cried so much I was surprised I didn’t flood my whole building.
