“Thank you, Dirk,” Scarlet said as she rubbed his leg again.
This practice wasn’t about physical touch. It was about emotional touch and connection. While I was afraid that the physical touch might distract or confuse Dirk, he didn’t seem too uncomfortable, so I let it be.
We continued the dyad back and forth between them for another ten minutes. I could see them both relaxing their shoulders. I could detect a change in tone when they spoke. This was always a wonderful exercise before we got into the tougher stuff.
“So now, I want you to ask this question of each other, starting with you Dirk. Just ask the question, listen, and then say thank you. You’ll switch back and forth on this question as well.” I waited for them both to nod.
Scarlet had moved, so she sat on the couch facing Dirk. He still had his posture aimed forward from the couch. He wasn’t ready to open up to Scarlet. She seemed sincere in trying to connect. He was still closed off.
“Say to Scarlet, tell me one thing you would like me to know about how you feel about our marriage. Then after she answers, just say ‘thank you”. Then, Scarlet, you will ask the same question. We can go back and forth for quite a while.”
Dirk nodded and Scarlet smiled like a Black Friday sales shopper who got the last Louboutin heels at Sax Fifth Avenue. She shifted her gaze so that she looked straight at her husband.
“Tell me one thing you want me to know about how you feel about our marriage,” Dirk asked, following the script perfectly.
Scarlet gazed into his dark eyes as he had finally turned his head to ask the question. She seemed to think about her answer and then let out a long, drawn-out sigh.
“I don’t feel like you believe in me anymore. You used to be so supportive of my career and now you don’t even ask me whether I am working. You haven’t supported one of my projects in over a year. Work keeps you so busy that I swear you care about it more than me.” She kept her hand on his knee as she spoke and bent just enough to provide him a magnificent view of her cleavage.
The room was silent for several seconds.
“Now you say thank you, Mr. Baxter,” I prompted.
“Thank you, Scarlet.” His tone did not show thanks.
“Now, you ask him, Scarlet,” I coached until they got the hang of this.
“Dirk, my love, tell me one thing you would like me to know about how you feel,” she asked, then added with a cautious smile. “About our marriage.”
“Concerning our marriage?” he asked.
“That or how you feel about sex with me,” Scarlet replied.
I gave Scarlet a look, and she rolled her eyes but remained silent.
“I love you, Scarlet, but my business is important to me. I’m so close to realizing my company’s vision. It’s a huge milestone and the wealth it will generate will last for our lifetime. Sex is one of the last things on my mind.”
“Say thank you, Scarlet.” I could see she was ready to say something.
“Thank you, Dirk.” She said, squeezing his thigh and offering a tentative smile.
Dirk took a deep breath before asking, “Tell me something you want me to know about how you feel about our marriage.”
“I don’t feel like you’ve been fair with me, baby. One night, I have special surprise for you and on Monday you ask for a divorce. It was so sudden. Surprising. I was shocked. And hurt.” She dabbed at her eye with a tissue she had pulled from her purse.
I gave Dirk a look when he didn’t thank her.
“Thank you.” He seemed visibly shaken by her vulnerability and the tears forming in her eyes.
Scarlet asked the question of Dirk.
“I feel like your love for me has faded over the last year. You’ve spent more time with your friends partying. Trying to go to parties where producers will be. I don’t think you even want to know about this huge merger and all the scrutiny that brings about.”
“Thank you darling,” Scarlet said. The words were sweet, but there was a hint of something there that I couldn’t quite discern.
“Tell me something else you would like me to know about how you feel.” I could see Dirk’s jaw tightening after asking.
“I think you care about money more than you do me. You told me you wanted a divorce and you are doing these counseling sessions just so you can keep more of your money. Then you moved out. You haven’t even tried to talk.”
