“Definitely.”
We make our way to the kitchen, and she removes a pitcher, always readily available. My father used to tease her about that.
“How have you been, son?” She sets a glass in front of me.
“I don’t know.” I have to be honest if I want her to understand. “I miss her.”
She sits in the chair across from me.
“But why do I sense there’s more?”
I take a deep breath and run my hands over my face.
“I can’t stop thinking about Hayley, and it’s making me feel like I’m a shit person. Like I’m disrespecting Erin. I— I feel like there is just so much we left unsaid. She looks at me like I’m the one who broke her heart, but she was the one who moved on. She never waited.”
Mom reaches out and places a hand over mine. “You should talk to her.”
“What good would that do? She’s married, she’s happy. I don’t want to mess that up.”
“She isn’t married,” my mother says giving me a where-did-you-hear-that look.
My eyes widen. “Hayley isn’t married?”
“She and that young man, Logan, split soon after their engagement. Sharon and I talk from time to time.” She shrugs. “So, it would do no harm talking to her.”
“I don’t know, Mom.”
“Whatever you decide to do is up to you, but you can’t hold onto the past. At some point, you’ve got to let that go.”
She was right. I just wasn’t sure what I’d even say to Hayley.
When I leave my mom’s house, I drive home and sit on the edge of the bed. I imagine Erin scolding me, telling me what a coward I’m being.
Erin knew I loved her, but it didn’t stop her from trying to convince me otherwise.
I look at the envelope on her dressing table, ignoring it yet again.
I kick off my shoes and crawl into bed.
I’m not ready for what she has to say.
