15
Wyatt
2018
“I don't think love is once in a lifetime. I think love is always a possibility.”
? Lindsay Detwiler, Then Comes Love
If I receiveone more fucking bouquet, I will go down to that flower shop and slap someone. Who are these people, and why do they keep sending me these odd arrangements with cryptic messages? This one is about a fish and bird who fell in love and couldn’t be together.
“Come to the place where the sea and sky meet, and you’ll see the sun once more."
The words annoyme so much I throw them against the wall. The impossible, taunting bouquet. I sit with my hands in my hair, and I sob. For the first time since Erin died, I cry. I let it all out, the hurt, the pain, the injustice, everything. This was not how our lives were supposed to turn out. I pick up the phone and call the number on the card.
A cheerful voice picks up. “Welcome to Bloom Heaven,” he chirps.
“Just stop sending me flowers! Just stop fucking sending me flowers!”
“Excuse me, sir, are you not happy with the arrangement?”
“I don’t want your arrangement. It disgusts me,” I spit. “I loathe it.”
“I am so sorry to hear that, sir. If I could get your name, contact details, and where we delivered, I could--”
“No, fuck off, just leave me alone!” I slam the phone down.
I get up and storm out of my office. “I’m going for a drive,” I shout to Thomas.
“Sure thing, boss.”
I get into my car and drive, and before I know it, I’m out at the lake, like the one I used to go fishing with my dad back in Redmond.
I get out and breathe in the fresh air that feels like heaven.
I’m losing it. I need to chill out, but I hate how those flowers make me feel. I hate how it makes me feel close to Erin, but how they remind me of Hayley.
I feel like I need a change. I should leave, get in my car, leave the shop to Thomas, and just disappear.
I walk back to my car. I need to speak to the one person who might understand.
* * *
“Wyatt,what a lovely surprise. Good to see you, son, come on in.”
Mom ushers me inside. The house looks and smells the same, but I can feel the shift in the air. The thing that used to make this a family home is missing. A complete family.
Her smile is bright for my benefit, but even all these years later, the glimmer in her eye has not returned.
That is what loss does; it takes the luster from existence.
My father lived a wonderful life, but those who've lost a loved one will tell you there was so much more life he could have lived. So many tomorrows that will never be.
I wrap my arms around her and place a kiss on her cheek. “How are you, Mom?”
“Better, now that you’re here. You’ve been so scarce.” She leans back and looks up at me, searching my eyes.
She smiles sadly. “Lemonade?”
