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It reminds me of a time so long ago, before I was free. There was a boy two beds down, and one day he shared all his food. He helped everyone clean up, gave away his good blanket, and then by morning he was gone. I never learned what happened to him, just that people fill their cup before they go.

I don’t understand what is happening. Valli is happy here, I know she is, so what has changed?

Eventually, we go to bed, and Noa is the first asleep, followed by Cipher. I lie with my eyes closed and listen to her breathing. Whatever is coming will have to get past me, and I hear everything.

At around two, her hand lifts my arm just enough to slide out of the bed. I lie there and listen, hoping she is only getting herself some water. Instead, she takes her jacket off the hook and sits down to put on her shoes. I wait until I hear the door open, then I get up and follow her. By the time I step outside, I see her shadow going down the path.

I know this island the way I know my own scars—every blind spot, every shortcut off the main path. So I follow silently behind her, keeping myself hidden.

She heads toward the residential area and takes something out of her pocket, then lets herself into the Jester’s house. Anger rises inside me like an inferno. I will kill the Jester with my bare hands if he is trying to take what’s mine.

I stand and wait for movement, for the lights to come on, but they don’t. It’s then I remember the Jester is off the island one night a week. No one knows where he goes, and no one asks. Dread fills me when she comes back outside with Rowan trailing behind her. She figured it out.

Everything I have tried to fix crumbles before me.

I want to stop her, but my feet are cemented to the ground, so I watch as my whole world shatters. She drags him behind her, and I know she is helping him leave. She will know I played a role in this, and now she will see the truth of what I am. Her, Cipher, and Noa. They all see the good in me, but there is next to no humanity left if I don’t have them.

I will myself to move; I cannot let her leave.

Something in me snaps at the thought, so I slip into my cornfield, moving alongside them until the path they are on comes to the end of the field, and I step out in front of them. He is not leaving with her—I won’t let him ruin her anymore. Rowan screams, falls on his ass, and scrambles backward. Valli steps between me and her brother, her arms raised, protecting him from me, even after everything he has done to her, and everything I am to her. Something inside me tears and breaks further.

“Cave, look at me. We’re leaving. I’m taking him off the island. Look at me.”

I do as she asks, diverting my gaze to her. My hands open and close at my sides, then as the beast inside me needs somewhere to go, I grab her. She fights me, and I fold her against my chest while her fists land on me. Rowan makes a sound behind us, and I turn my head to glare at him. He sits down, his whole body shaking in fear.

I carry her into the cornfield, to the post in the center, and there I set her down and bind her wrists. Yet as I am tying the rope, I can’t bring myself to do it right, meaning she could break free with ease.

Valli glares at me, but I need her to understand, so I open my mouth and will the word out of me.

“Danger.”

She huffs. “Danger? Cave, you put him in a cage like an animal.”

“Safe.”

“You lied to me. You had so long to tell me, yet you didn’t. I don’t care if you wanted to keep me safe. I love that you wanted to, but it’s not your job. You had no right.”

Bells chiming, the Jester appears through the stalks with Rowan’s body thrown over his shoulder.

“You must know he did this for you. Your brother’s a dead man out there, but in the basement, he is fed, warm, and untouchable because of your scarecrow. I would have ended him the first night, but my comrade’s riddle was quite heartwarming really. ‘I did not plant him, so I will not reap him. Only her hands hold the end.’ That’s you in case you were wondering. Nobody on this earth is allowed to touch him, except for you. You are the only reason he is breathing. He is alive because he belongs to you.”

I watch it all sink in, that she finally understands. “You were saving him?” she whispers. “For me?” She walks to me and tips her head up to look at me. “You know how I feel about you hurting my brother, and you lied to me. It’s my line and you know it, yet you crossed it day after day. No matter what your intentions were, that’s not okay. Maybe I made a huge mistake.”

“No.” It’s all I can say. I hate how my past robbed me of forming words when I need them.

“I’m taking him off the island right now,” Valli says, and when I move, she puts her hand on my chest. “Let me do this. It’s what I want.”

I did all this for her. I kept him safe, letting her breathe for the first time in her life. Now I’ll put his life in her hands to do with as she pleases. If I stop her, she will hate me, so I step aside.

Valli walks past me and collects her brother from the ground where the Jester dropped him, and he stands, clinging to her side, looking back at me with a smirk on his face.

I stand and watch them walk away as my heart breaks into a million pieces. The worst parts of me are clawing their way up, and I don’t know how long I can fight them off.

I try to remember that I did this for her, and if she wants to leave, I need to let her. She will come back—I know she will.

My vision blurs, and her voice fills my head as my fears take over. “I’m done, Cave. I don’t want to see you again. I thought I could help you, but nobody can.”

I grab at the cornstalks and roar. Though she didn’t say that, someone in my past did, and it rings through my head over and over in the sound of Valli’s voice.