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“Oh, I guess I’m just a Meadows, huh?” She grins. “Don’t worry about it. It takes more than a snobby bitch to get my mood down.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” I say, staring at her admiringly. “Thank you, Rosie. It means a lot.”

“You’re welcome, Brett.” She leans up and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “That’s what best friends do for each other.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” I rub the top of her head, and for a few seconds, I want to do more. I want to pull her into me and kiss her, but instead, I hold my hand up so we can high-five.

“You know we might have to practice a bit more than high-fiving if we’re going to convince everyone we’re together.” She winks at me slowly and then licks her lips seductively. “But don’t worry; we can plan that out another night. For now, we should start writing down lists of information for each other. That way, if we’re quizzed by your family members, it’ll look like we really are dating.”

Chapter Nine

ROSIE

“And that, folks, is how orgasms are made.” I throw my hands up into the air and look over to see Brett’s reaction to the punch line of my joke.

His lips don’t even twitch as he gazes at me, and my heart sinks.

“Oh Lord, I’m going to bomb.” I groan into my hands and cover my face. “I need your help in escaping.”

“You can’t escape.” He shakes his head and nods toward the front of the comedy club. “Dalton, Sage, Roman, Lucia, and Izzy are sitting down and waiting for you to get onstage.”

“But my jokes aren’t funny. You didn’t laugh once.”

“Ha-ha.” He offers me a fake smile, and I can’t help but laugh.

“That doesn’t make me feel better, Brett.” I rub my forehead and take a seat on the cheap plastic chair, hoping it doesn’t collapse under me. “Be honest with me, Brett, am I going to have tomatoes thrown at me?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “I’m not sure if anyone brought any with them …” He pauses, and his mouth breaks out into a grin. “I jest. You will be fine. I promise you that people will laugh.”

“You didn’t laugh.”

“I barely laugh.” He kneels down on the ground and grabs my hands. “Deep breaths, Rosie. Just take a few deep breaths.”

“What do you mean, you barely laugh? Are you saying my jokes are so unfunny that you barely laugh at them? Are you?”

“Oh my gosh, Rosie. I want you to listen to me. Take three deep breaths.” His eyes bore into mine, and then he grips my shoulders. “Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth,” he says.

I breathe in through my nose.

“Hold it for three seconds. Now breathe out. Do that two more times,” he lectures me, and I continue. “I was just saying that I barely laugh. Not at your jokes, not at life in general. I’m not the sort of person who goes around laughing at everything. You should know that by now. It’s going to be okay.”

“I just feel like I’m going to mess up. I know I told everyone I wanted to be a comedian, and I invited everyone, but I feel like it was a mistake because what if I suck? Maybe I should have gone to a few different places and done it first.”

My eyes widen as Brett leans forward and gives me a light kiss.

“What was that for?” I ask him.

“I wanted to take away your nerves and calm you down, and I figured⁠—”

“You figured kissing me would calm me down? What was that?”

“What? If we’re going to be boyfriend and girlfriend, albeit fake, you’re going to have to be able to accept random kisses from me. And my tongue wasn’t in your mouth. That was barely a kiss.”

“You just wanted to kiss me.” I tilt my head to the side and watch as he runs his fingers through his hair.

“I just wanted to be supportive. There are a lot of people out there, waiting to hear you, and you’re going to kill it.”

“I don’t know.” I take a deep breath. “But thank you, I suppose. Thank you for being here. Thank you for trying to make me feel better.”