Page 94

“Me and you. Outside of the kids.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. “Dom. There is no you and me outside of the kids.”

“Well, I want to change that.”

Surely, even he isn’t this stupid. “You have a wife.”

“I’ll divorce her.”

I gape at him. If I didn’t already have a complete lack of romantic interest in him, watching him shrug while he offhandedly says he’s going to divorce the woman who raised his three children to adulthood would be enough to make me want nothing to do with him.

“I’m not interested in us being any more than co-parents. Maybe friends, someday, if I see you really putting in an effort with the kids. But we will never be more than that.”

I couldn’t possibly be any clearer, but Dom just looks confused.

“But you used to want this.”

“Right. And then you left me to struggle on my own while raising two kids. And my frontal lobe developed. And I found out you’d been lying to me this whole time and I was actually your fucking mistress.”

He throws up his hands. “I said I was sorry for that!”

“When? You have literally never apologized to me. For anything. I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you say the word ‘sorry’ in nine years.”

Dom shakes his head, his eyes cold and furious. “This is all because of Killian. He’s turned you against me.”

“Do you hear yourself right now?” I laugh, but it’s humorless, out of disbelief more than anything else. “This has nothing to do with Killian and everything to do with you.”

“So, you’re saying if you and Killian were just friends, you still wouldn’t want me? Don’t lie to me. He showed up here, got in your head, and made you think you can handle all of this on your own. None if it’s real. You need me, and you’ll realize that when he leaves you. You’re lucky I’m willing to come back to you. Hell, you used to respect me. Where’s that Scarlett?”

He’s fucking delusional. That’s the only explanation. “That Scarlett learned to respect herself,” I answer, fighting to keep my voice level. The last thing I want is for the kids to hear shouting and come out to see what’s going on. “And that was because of Killian, actually. Because he told me the truth about you. I’ve spent years feeling guilty, like it’s my fault I got pregnant so young, like it’s my fault I can’t give the kids as much as other parents can. But you know what? I forgive myself. It’s not my fault. It’s yours.” He rears back like I’ve slapped him, but fuck, it feels good to say it out loud. “You’re a terrible dad, an even worse husband, and you’re right, I don’t respect you. So, yeah, even if Killian and I were nothing more than friends, I wouldn’t want you back.”

He sounds a little deflated when he responds. “But you are. More than friends.”

It says a lot that he’s more focused on me, and the fact that I don’t want a relationship with him, than the fact he doesn’t have a relationship with his kids. It makes me think of all the phone calls where he spent five minutes with the kids and kept me on the phone for twice that long. All of the texts I’ve sent, the pictures of the kids where he only replied with a thumbs up. The pictures of me and the kids where he told me how good I looked, how much he missed me.

“Why did you come here, Dom? Was it for the kids, or because you thought I was moving on?”

He doesn’t answer. He doesn’t need to—it’s written all over his face. It was never about the kids. I’ve been pushing for him to have a better relationship with Caitlin and James, but he doesn’t deserve them. He doesn’t deserve any of them.

“Well, I have moved on. And there’s nothing you can do about that.”

“And what happens when he leaves? When the kids are crying because they miss him and he never calls?”

“You don’t know your son if you think he’d do that. You don’t know Killian, period. Or Ronan, or Fallon, or Caitlin or James. You don’t know me, Dom. And I’m so happy about that. I’m glad I’m not the girl I was when you met me anymore.

“Killian is a good man. Ronan and Fallon are good people. Thanks to Carrie—not you. I can’t make you show up for Caitlin and James, but I’m going to raise them to be good people, in spite of who their dad is. I don’t need anyone to help me raise my kids; I can do that all on my own. But I don’t have to, because I have people. Good people who love us and care about us. And you are not one of those people. If you want to be? Great. Fucking act like it. I’m not going to beg you. The kids and I will be just fine without you.”

I wish I could go back in time and tell the woman who cried when she found out she was having a second baby that she would be okay. Better than okay. Her babies are healthy and happy and loved. And she is too. And she did it all without the man who got her into that mess and left her to pick up the pieces.

The man who clearly realizes that he can’t win this argument. So, he says nothing. He just turns and walks away, like he always does. But this time, as I watch him storm out of the back yard and peel out of the driveway in his rental car, all I feel is relief.

The back door opens and I jump, spinning around to see Killian standing there, staring at me. He looks a little stunned.

“How much did you hear?” I ask, fiddling with the zip of my jacket.

The porch creaks under his weight as he steps outside and crosses the weathered wood. He stops in front of me and cups my face. His fingers are warm against my frozen cheeks. “A lot,” he answers.

Shit. He’s already so mad at his dad, and he just had to listen to him telling me he still wanted me. “God, Kill, I’m so—”