Page 50

February 13

Remy’d tossed and turned for a good long while after that confusing-as-fuck moment with Jed out in the kitchen, when Jed had stood so close and wrapped him up so carefully that he’d forgotten every reason he was pretending he didn’t want more. Not when Jed hadn’t said no when Remy said touch me.

Which he still couldn’t believe he’d done.

But it had felt like Jed was tracing fire down his side when he’d reached out and finally touched Remy’s skin. There was no way he could just stand there and wait to see what Jed wanted. Not when Jed was one breath away from pulling him in.

And when he’d kissed Jed and Jed had kissed him back, holding him in place like he planned to take Remy apart piece by piece—it was so much better than Remy had imagined it would be. But then Jed had stopped them, leaving Remy to go to bed painfully aroused, wondering whether Jed would say anything the next day or whether he’d think better of it during the night.

He wondered if Jed had lain awake, too, thinking about what he’d say to Remy this morning.

When he finally dragged himself out of his bedroom, Jed was sitting at the kitchen island, drinking coffee and finishing up a bowl of yogurt and muesli like he often did on days when they didn’t have to go in. He had already finished his normal morning routine, and his thin T-shirt clung to his shoulders. Remy wanted to drape himself across Jed’s back and nuzzle his face into Jed’s neck, and for fuck’s sake, he needed to concentrate on acting like he had some self-control, at least until he figured out where Jed’s head was at.

“Hey,” Jed said, looking up as Remy walked into the kitchen. “Coffee’s fresh.”

“Thanks.” Remy brushed past Jed to pour himself a cup. He could do this. He could act like he wasn’t all worked up over one kiss that Jed might or might not have thought better of, at least until they had a chance to talk.

“How’re you feeling this morning?” Jed asked. He seemed hesitant, Remy thought. Like maybe he was asking about more than Remy’s bruises.

“A little better. Didn’t get the best sleep, but I’ll live. Um, my sister’s flight is getting in soon. I told her I’d pick her up. Is it okay if I borrow a car?”

“Yeah, of course. But, Remy . . .” Jed trailed off, watching him, and Remy realized he was limping as he pulled out the oatmeal.

“Yeah?”

Jed didn’t respond right away, like he’d started out thinking he was going to say something and then thought better of it. It made Remy feel like maybe he wasn’t the only one who didn’t have a clue about what to do next.

When Jed finally spoke, he’d clearly decided that now was not the time to talk about what they’d almost done, or what Remy very much hoped they would do in the near future.

“Looks like your foot got bruised pretty badly.”

“Eh. It’ll be fine.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be driving on it, though.”

“It’s not that bad.”

“Hal will kill me if you come back from break injured. Don’t make me get in trouble for letting you spend a couple of hours driving to pick your sister up.”

Remy glanced at him to see if he was serious and sighed. “I don’t want Lily to take a car all the way here, okay? I’ll ice it when I get back.”

“Why don’t you let me pick her up while you get some rest?”

“Really? I’m sure you have better things to do today.”

“I don’t, though. I haven’t made plans. So let me do this. If you don’t think your sister will mind, that is.”

Remy really looked at Jed then.

Let me do this.

That’s why Remy couldn’t pretend anymore that just being friends with Jed was going to be enough. It felt like Jed was taking care of Remy because he wanted to, not because he thought Remy needed it. And Remy was beginning to be able to read Jed’s expressions better, he thought. Between the dark circles under Jed’s eyes and the faint wrinkle in his brow, it looked like he might truly be worried about Remy. And maybe about the two of them together. Like maybe he didn’t quite know what to make of the night before, either, and all he could think to do about it was make sure Remy didn’t get more hurt.

“That’s really nice of you,” Remy said, finally. “And Lily will be glad to meet you. But I’m warning you, she talks a lot more than I do.”

“That’s okay.”

“And she’s probably not going to want to listen to your podcasts.”