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Ran from my self-recriminations.

Ran from my uncertainty.

Ran from the truth nipping at the edges of my consciousness. That maybe the only thing stopping me from forgiving Joey was forgiving myself.

CHAPTER 21

JOYRIDE

Glitter Balls lived up to its name, with two disco-type balls covered in glitter suspended from the ceiling over the center of the room. Today, the dance floor was full of tables so that the crowd could enjoy the drag show up close. There was a small stage with stairs extending off either side to allow the queens to descend into the crowd.

I hadn’t ever been to a drag show here—but I’d come to one of their regular nights to check out Riverton’s only gay club. I’d recognized a few faces, but unfortunately, they’d also recognized mine. I’d decided that being another anonymous face in Omaha was easier. Ironic that I’d still pulled someone from Riverton—and the worst guy possible, too—when I laid eyes on Kit.

I couldn’t regret it, even though I should. I wanted him too much.

“What do you think?” I said to Dakota, gesturing out to the sparkly balls swaying overhead, the stage lit up with purple and red lighting, and the tables beginning to fill in with groups of friends.

She grinned at me. “It looks amazing. We’re going to have so much fun. I just hope your friends don’t think I’m a gate-crashing weirdo.”

I chuckled. “No way. They’ll love meeting you.”

Dakota and I had arrived early to ensure we could get a decent place for her to sit. She couldn’t just squeeze into tight spaces, and if the place was too packed, she’d have a lot of trouble wheeling between tables.

I let her pick the best spot—a table at stage right, so she’d have an easier time getting out when she was ready to leave.

“Sometimes, my body decides to ruin my plans,” she confessed. “I need a quick exit, just in case…”

“Okay. No problem. If you need anything tonight, just tell me. I’m here for you.”

I moved a chair out of the way, and she rolled into its place at the table.

“This is supposed to be fun, not Dakota Amends 101.” She grimaced. “You didn’t just offer to go to this show out of some sort of guilt, did you?” She looked down. “Never mind, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.”

“I thought it’d be fun,” I said. “Plus, I’d like us to be real friends, you know?”

She glanced up, giving me a more genuine smile. “I’d like that too, Joey.”

She was right that part of the reason I’d offered was because I’d do anything to make Dakota happy. But I’d missed hanging out with friends, too. The Redemption guys were great, but they were more like family. We didn’t just go out to have a good time.

That was something Dakota and I had in common. She didn’t know it, but the friends I’d invited tonight weren’t actually that close with me.

I’d invited Aiden and asked him if he could bring some extra friends.

Hollywood had to watch Ruby, so he was out. Tex was working. Knight would come, but he had night school now that he was trying to obtain his tattoo licensing. I couldn’t even imagine Ghost at a drag show. It was tempting to ask just to see his expression.

My actual friends from back in the day—Logan, Heath, and Trevor—had almost gotten my ass thrown in jail the last time we hung out. I mostly ignored their invitations now, because Knight had made me see that I couldn’t fuck around and get in trouble when I was on parole.

I didn’t have a lot in common with them anymore, anyway. They just wanted to ask invasive questions about prison and brag about all the women they took home. Now that I was out of the closet, I really didn’t want to sit around and pretend to be a womanizing ass.

“Hey, guys!” Aiden came up to us with a trail of people. “Joey, you remember Flynn’s boyfriend, Bailey, right?”

I straightened. “Yeah, of course. Nice to see you again.”

“Yeah, you too.” Bailey pulled out a chair to my left. “I needed a break from work and school, so I jumped at the chance to come out.”

The rest of the group—two men and a woman—took seats, too.

I recognized most of them. My family had moved in the same circles as the Princes and the Golds, so I’d known Allison and Emory my whole life—though they’d been almost five years older than me, so we weren’t friends. Allison had also married Matteo, the Redemption Road director, so I’d seen her in passing since then.