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He tilted his head, stepping a little closer. “You could have told me, you know? I wouldn’t have stopped being your friend.”

I met his eyes and spotted the tiny flicker of smugness there. “You knew all along, didn’t you?”

“Nah, not really. Just…kinda got this sense that you liked me more than a normal friend would. I, uh, kind of liked it, to be honest.”

My stomach turned over. “Liked it, as in you’re…”

“No,” he said quickly. “Nothing like that. Just…everyone enjoys being admired, right?”

“Right,” I said flatly. “Well, it’s less fun on the other side.”

He winced. “Right, I didn’t mean to… Well, I just meant I’d have understood. That’s all.”

I shook my head. He’d never understand. Not really. How could he understand the agony of wanting someone so intensely, of feeling so close to them, and also knowing they’d reject everything that you were if you ever revealed it? And maybe he would have been okay with the news I was gay, but that didn’t mean he’d ever love me back.

“Hey, Joey.” Knight’s voice made me turn. “Not like you to be early, man.”

He leaned in and gave me a one-armed hug. Trevor took a quick step away from me. Was he afraid the gay was contagious? Maybe he was less accepting than he thought. He clearly liked the way I used to hang on his every word, but one brief instance of male affection in front of him and he looked ready to run.

“Hey, Knight. This is Trevor. We were friends in high school.”

“Nice to meet you,” Knight said.

Trevor gave him a nod. “Sure, you too. Joey, are you coming with us or not?”

Knight raised an eyebrow at me.

If I went with the guys, I could escape my problems for a while, but probably create new ones. If I stayed…well, I’d get grilled about blowing off the Redemption Road meeting yesterday. No doubt about it. They’d ask questions. They’d offer advice. It would be a whole song and dance that I didn’t really want.

But maybe I’d wised up since I’d first gotten out of prison. Because I was going to stay and take my medicine.

“Nah, man. You go have fun.”

Knight’s hand tightened on my shoulder, a seal of approval.

“Okay, Joey,” Trevor said. “See you around.”

I missed the friendship we’d once had, but I didn’t miss what it had done to me. Our paths had diverged, and the spark of kinship wasn’t there anymore. Maybe Trevor sensed that, too, because he left without a second glance.

As he went through the door, he nearly bumped into Hollywood and Tex as they came in.

Hollywood was dressed in designer jeans and a fitted button-down shirt, looking almost preppy. Tex wore grass-stained jeans rocking a hole at the knee, a faded blue Cowboys T-shirt, and a baseball cap, a country boy through and through. They were an odd pair, but somehow it worked for them.

They scanned the bar, looking for us, then started toward the pool tables where we stood.

Knight was watching me, though. I could feel the stare boring into the side of my face.

“What?” I asked testily.

“I didn’t know you were still hanging out with those guys.”

“We were just catching up,” I said. “No big deal.”

“Hm. You got an early start tonight, huh?”

I tipped my bottle up, finishing off my third beer. “Maybe. You want to play pool?”

“Not really,” he said. “Come on, let’s go sit down. We’ll get some food in you.”