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I barely caught Kat’s limp body, following her to the ground to lay her gently. The screams around me were deafening—but this time no one was having any fun. In shock, I looked at Kat’s lifeless body. Her face was intact, but everything inside was pulverized, running out from every orifice in her head.
His magic was mostly reserved for The Dark, but I’d seen him kill people this way before in the decade I’d been here. Except it had never been anyone the king particularly cared about before. Never anyone he might deem important.
But he’d killed Kat, of all people. His queen. One of the only wives he truly needed to maintain his reign other than Cali, and certainly the only one he actually liked. And if he could kill her, then …
I scrambled to my feet and rushed to grab a terrified Cali’s hand, leading her quickly through the frantic crowd and out the doors. I thought of nothing but which secret hall led where, which one the king would never think of using, how to get Cali the furthest away from what had just happened.
The duke had been regrettable, if necessary. But this was wrong. So wrong, I barely knew how to process it, except how I did every death I’d encountered here—force myself to push it aside, knowing it was pointless to mourn. Knowing there’d eventually be more. That didn’t seem good enough for Kat. We hadn’t been friends, exactly, but we were familiar. I’d known her for ten whole years. And she had been a good person, despite our differing opinions.
We’d had more in common than I thought.
But if I took time to mourn as I should, how would I ever be levelheaded enough to protect Cali?
I pulled her into my room, bolting the door behind us. When I turned to check on Cali she looked as if she might faint.
“Are you all right?” I asked, even though it was clear she wasn’t.
“How did he…?” Cali was trembling, her eyes wide as she looked at me. I wanted so badly to comfort her, but she wouldn’t allow it now, I knew. “What sort of demonic magic was that? He killed Kat with … with only the snap of his fingers. How is it even possible?”
“Do you see now why we don’t encourage him to use his magic outside of The Dark?” I couldn’t help but sound frustrated, though I tried to quell my anger for Cali’s sake. “Why I never wanted you to witness it?”
She looked like she wanted to cry, and I couldn’t bear it. “I’ve healed people with awful injuries before. But I’ve never witnessed—” She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand as tears overcame her. I took a few steps closer, closing the gap when she didn’t deny me. She wrapped her arms around my waist, and I held her without a second thought.
“I’m so sorry for doubting you,” she said, her voice muffled against me. “I’m sorry for everything.”
“That doesn’t matter now,” I said. I used to hand Cali handkerchiefs when she cried. Dry her tears. Now it felt as if I should do more, but I didn’t know how. I’d always planned my life so meticulously, considered all possible outcomes. I’d even known how to avoid the issue of the king lashing out with his magic—or at least I thought I did. But now that it happened, I didn’t know how to fix it. Because I had no idea why he’d done it.
It felt as if I was losing control of everything.
Cali pulled back to look up at me, her eyes wide with uncertainty. “Do you forgive me?”
She didn’t realize I’d already done so before she’d even said a word, but I nodded anyway, running my fingers over her braids.
“No, I mean, for what I said to you yesterday,” she said. “How I treated you. It was an awful thing to do, especially when I know Vi—”
I wiped her tears with my thumbs, but still I couldn’t find the right words. Because what she had said, what she had called me … it was a wound that would never heal. I wasn’t going to lie and say she hadn’t hurt me. I wasn’t going to say that everything was okay, when only a few moments ago I’d felt sick with desperation for the girl who’d broken my heart. And yet I loved her. My God, I needed her like I needed air. Perhaps that’s why my lungs hurt so badly when she wasn’t near.
“We have to figure out what’s triggered the king to act this way,” I said—I needed something I could actually process, and emotions weren’t it. “Adjusting to a new knight isn’t it, since he allowed you to live in the adjoining room.”
“You’re so good to me,” she said. “Better than I deserve.”
I paused, equally troubled and confused by her tone. “Don’t say that. You’re a good person.”
“But I wasn’t to you—I made an awful mistake, and yet you’re still here taking care of me, as if I deserve it. You’re so good, and kind, and gentle, and sweet. And brilliant. You’re the smartest person I know.”
I paused to take in her words, overwhelmed. “Why are you saying these things?”
“Because you need to know I didn’t mean the thing I said about you yesterday,” she said.
“He killed Kat,” I said, instead of acknowledging her words, taking a few steps away and turning from her to clear my head. “Two people dead, two days in a row. There has to be a cause.”
“Are you listening to what I’m telling you?” Cali asked, grabbing the back of my shirt in desperation.
Kat is dead. We don’t have time to think about my hurt feelings.
There was never time to think about my feelings. And yet, Cali—sweet, beautiful Cali—could think of nothing but.
“Yesterday you hated me.” I was shocked by how little control I had over the tremble of my voice, over the tears burning at the backs of my eyes. “Please, don’t give me hope, now, if you don’t mean it.”