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“I’m a bad lay.”

“What?” Jacob said.

“I’m terrible at sex. That’s why Mr. Halifax left. I would have left me too.”

“I don’t think that’s what happened,” Axel said.

“Oh, no, it is. I’m sure of it.”

Jacob shook his head. “That is definitely not what happened. What happened is that that asshole took advantage of you and then panicked and ran away.”

“Like a little bitch,” RJ said.

I shook my head. “He didn’t take advantage of me...”

“Yes he did,” Jacob said. “He was your teacher. He never should have put his hands on you.” Jacob tightened his grip on my shoulder.

“I wanted him to. I wanted all of it. This isn’t his fault.” I felt the tears threatening to spill again. But I couldn’t spend another night crying in my room. I couldn’t. And this explanation was the only thing that gave me any solace. For some reason it was easier to blame myself than Mr. Halifax. Because if I did something wrong, he wasn’t the villain. I was. And then it wasn’t so bad that I still loved him.

“Yes it is his fault, Soph,” RJ said.

“You guys aren’t getting it,” I said. “I thought he was enjoying it as much as I was in the moment. But I’ve been over it over and over again in my head. And there’s really only one conclusion. He hated it. He hated it so much that that he couldn’t even cum in me. He had to pull out and use his own hand to release all over me.”

Liam laughed. “Yeah, no. That’s not why he did that.”

“Yes it is,” I said. “I’m a terrible lay.”

Liam shook his head. “Actually, he did that because he was super into you. He was basically claiming you.”

All I really heard was the “was” in his sentence. Past tense. Because Mr. Halifax was no longer into me. “I don’t think so. And he probably tried to hit my face because he thought I was ugly.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Scarlett asked. “That’s...preposterous.”

“Yeah, as much as I hate picturing any of this,” RJ said. “Liam is right. He was claiming you.”

I shook my head. “No, he didn’t. If he had claimed me he’d be with me. I couldn’t get him off and then he wanted to cover my face. I’m like the worst at sex.”

“You’re not,” Jacob said. “There’s not a chance in hell that’s true.”

“He literally skipped town after fucking me.”

“Because he’s a creep,” Jacob said. “This isn’t about you. It’s about him.”

I just shrugged. Because I knew the truth. I’d enjoyed every second of it. And Mr. Halifax hadn’t. “What movie are we watching?”

Scarlett grabbed the remote out of my hand. “We’re not done talking about this. Soph, you’re the most popular girl at our school. You’re beautiful. And smart. And the most confident person I know.”

Well she was definitely wrong about that last thing. I wasn’t confident. Maybe I used to be. But this week had felt like ten years. Whatever confidence I had was long gone.

“And there’s no way you’re bad at sex,” Jacob said. “That’s the most ridiculous conclusion I’ve ever heard.”

“Well, let me prove it to you. Let’s go bang, Jacob.” I patted his thigh.

“What?” He lowered his eyebrows as he stared at me.

“Let’s go knock one out real quick so I can show you how awful I am.”

“Soph,” RJ said.