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My mouth drooled but I was not ready for it. “Um... Can... Can you sit on the couch please?” Finally finding my voice.

He walked a few steps across the room, and sat on the couch with his legs spread wide. He pressed the palm of his hand on his cock, probably to relieve the pressure. I took a deep breath and told myself I could do this. I wanted this! Then made my way over to where he was sitting.

CHAPTER 34

ALEX

My balls were already tightening and we had only kissed. I needed to try and relieve some of the discomfort from how hard I was, pressing the palm of my hand on my hard dick but it wasn't working. He looked so nervous but his cock was as hard as mine, and pupils were blown wide.

Standing in front of me, I could see he was struggling. Evident that he went through horrible things with his ex. That motherfucker hurt him! It made me furious! How fucking could he? Sam looked like a scared, wild animal about to be caught and I wouldn’t have that. Not with me. I wanted to make sure he knew he was safe with me.

“Sam, we don't have to do anything if...”

He shook his head, interrupting my attempt to reassure him. “I want to, but… I… Can I be the one doing the touching, if you are comfortable with it? If you even want me to. I’m ok with you holding me like before but the... you know…” His eyes flicked down at his cock, and it became that much more clear how far his trauma goes. His trauma seeped out of him, straight into my chest. All I wanted was to make it all go away. To build him up. Put his broken pieces back together.

“Of course, Pup. You take control. You call the shots. You say stop, we stop. Ok? No questions asked. Look… I wouldn’t even know what to do. I've never done anything with a man. So I am happy to sit here and learn.” I smirked, trying to lighten the mood. A soft laugh escaped him and his shoulders relaxed.

“I actually like that idea. I could show you.” He mused. Straddling my lap. My dick still straining.

I was so hard, I felt like I could explode just by him looking at my dick, excited to experience new things and explore. The fact it was with Sam, made it a hundred times better.

We were face-to-face and I made sure my hands were where he could see them, on his thighs. He didn't seem to mind it, so I was going to keep them there unless he told me otherwise.

“Thank you for being patient with me.” he said, pressing his lips to mine and shuffling closer to me. Our cocks pressed together, making us both gasp.

He was the same size as me, from what I could feel over our clothes, which is impressive for a guy his height. I had never thought about another man's dick before, but thinking of how hard Sam was, was making mine twitch, making me arch my hips into him.

He stopped the kiss to ask, “Is this ok?”

Breathless, I said, “Yeah Pup, it's more than ok. You can do whatever you want to me.”

When his lips met mine, I could feel that he was smiling. Good. He pulled me firmly against him, leaving no space between us and started grinding his cock on mine. It was so strange but also… So. Fuuuuucking. Good. His movements were slow and sensual, just how I liked it. I felt connected to him. This felt monumental, it felt... right.

My heart was hammering out of my chest, threatening to escape, despite the slow pace. He was controlling the movements, the speed, our pleasure and the kisses. I wanted him to feel in control. I wanted him to use me, to take it all back. Everything that that monster took from him.

I swear I was floating in the clouds when he picked up the speed. He started panting and keening into my mouth. And God… I wanted to swallow those sounds and keep them forever etched inside my mind. Bottle them up. These were the real pleasure noises, unlike loud theatrical screams Tess used to make. This experience was eye opening.

His hands reached for the hair at the nape of my neck, and grabbed at it, gently but firmly. Pressing our dicks harder, I could feel us both twitch. I started shaking from the effort not to come in my pants and embarrass myself. But I couldn’t bring myself to stop him. Unable to take my eyes off him, taking his pleasure from me, I thought how beautiful he was when he let go.

He pulled away from the kiss, and looked straight into my eyes. “Alex?” he breathed my name out like a prayer, rolling his hips faster and harder.

“Yes Pup?” I said through gritted teeth, struggling to keep my composure. My balls were tightening and my orgasm was building fast.

“I really like you… I… Alex... I’m gonna…” without breaking eye contact, he kisses me again and his hips start arching into me. With jerky movements, he was cumming, while moaning into my lips. I couldn’t stop my orgasm even if I wanted to now.

“Fuuuuuuck.” My hands shot up at his hips and I spilled so hard, I lost hearing for a few seconds.

After that amazing fucking orgasm barreled through me, I managed to restart my breathing again. With our foreheads pressed together, we were breathing each other's air, eyes still connected, something clicked in place between us. A feeling of rightness, a connection that was unavoidable. I felt it snap into place. He felt it too.

I felt the hint of it when he bumped into me those weeks ago, outside this very house. I never stopped thinking of his beautiful amber eyes. Even if this was all we got to do, I feel like I'd been given a precious gift. I could see the trust he just placed in my hands. I would make it my mission never to betray it. I'll never betray him.

I just blew a load in my pants, like a horny teenager seeing boobs for the first time. Him doing it too, made me feel a little less embarrassed. Though when he had done it, it was the sexiest fucking thing I ever seen.

“W… Was that ok Pup. I am sorry if I came too, fa… I...” Shit. Shit. Shit! I realized I had my hands on his hips gripping him, I promised… Fuck! My hands flew off his hips and I shoved them fast under my thighs, sitting on them. Guilt consumed me for going back on my promise. I never wanted to scare him.

His eyes went wide for a second, searching for the source of my freak out until he realized why I was panicking. “Aw Alex.” he leaned in, giving me a quick peck, “It was perfect. It’s ok. I am Ok. I said you could touch me just not under the belt. I just need to work towards that in my head. I like your touches.” He grabbed my arms, placing them back on his hips, “I trust you.”

CHAPTER 35