Page 40 of Golden Ruin

“So, wait a second. He just walked out without saying anything?” Dez asks, flicking her chopsticks as she scans the platter, trying to decide which piece she’ll go for next.

“Basically,” I shrug, thinking back to an hour ago when I fixed Jax’s plate and offered to do the same for Sterling. “I offered him a bowl of chili, he looked at me like I had three eyes, then made a beeline for his truck.”

“Damn. Did he at least say goodbye?” Jules chimes in, biting into a strawberry.

“I mean, yeah, but he was just… I don’t know… being kind of weird.”

I haven’t shared any info with them about the night Matt visited. But honestly, Sterling’s been off ever since. More than once, I’ve thought about apologizing for putting him in such an awkward position, but I’m not even sure that’s the issue. Yeah, it seems like he’s upset with me, but who even knows at this point.

I kind of just wish I’d never had Matt over.

Blue’s eyeing me as I slump deeper into the couch, nursing a bottle of water while I overthink things.

“Well, aside from all that, what’s it like living together?” she asks, and her tone is soft, innocent.

I shrug. “Like you’d expect, I guess. We’re pretty much like housemates. Housemates who co-parent,” I add with a distant smile while I think on it. “He’s surprisingly thoughtful, though. He’s constantly asking how I feel, bought my favorite snacks from the grocery store. Things like that.”

I stop short of telling them about the clothes, the shoes, the laptop. Because I know what they’d say, what they’d think. They’re known for reading too much into things when it comes to Sterling and me, so they’d have a field day with information like that.

“Sounds like he put a lot of thought into making sure you’re comfortable here,” Joss says, and I nod.

“Yeah. I guess he did.”

I get lost in my thoughts, remembering how I felt seated in his bathroom while he trimmed my hair, how safe I feel at night knowing he’d never let anything bad happen to me or Jax on his watch, how something inside me came to life when he remembered something as small as why I hate the smell of flowers.

I knew he’d been attentive back in the day, cared about my likes and dislikes. I guess I just assumed that, after so many years, he’d forgotten the little details.

“Uh… you still with us?”

Jules’ question makes it clear I’ve missed something.

“Sorry, what was the question?”

She gives me a weird look before repeating herself. “I asked how Jax is holding up?”

I blink, leaving my eyes closed half a second longer than necessary to clear my head.

“He’s doing well. He’s had a couple nightmares, but otherwise, you’d never know anything happened. He’s even ready to go back to school.”

She smiles at that part. “He’s such a strong kid. It’s hard to tell which of you he got that from.”

“Both, I think.” I smile and instantly catch myself when my mind starts to drift again. The only visual that makes it through is Jax falling asleep on Sterling’s chest last night during story time. Then, I shut the memory down.

Quickly.

Completely.

“I’m loving the haircut, by the way,” Dez cuts in, arching a brow. “Tell Sterling he does good work.”

She says it in this way that makes it clear she’s being messy.

“Whatever, bitch. No,” I shoot back, and she tips over laughing. “Anyway, I feel like all we’ve been talking about is me. What have I missed?”

I do a scan of my girls, looking around the circle we’ve made on the floor where we’re seated around the food on the coffee table.

“Oh! Ricky and I are making plans for my birthday. It’s gonna be big, and it’s gonna be themed, so be ready. That’s all I’m saying for now. Be. Ready,” she repeats.

“Noted. I’ll be on the lookout for an invite,” Jules says, then our gazes shift to Joss when she speaks up.