Page 110 of Plug and Drain

“Our concepts of ‘deserving’ differ, I think.”

“Wolves respect a firm hand,” Nathaniel explained as if Arken hadn’t spoken. “She cannot refuse if you do not give her a choice.”

“An outdated alpha theory,” Arken muttered. “And a sweeping generalisation. Not all wolves are the same.”

“No,” Nathaniel said thoughtfully. “I suppose not.”

Arken stumbled from the tavern a few hours later, having stewed over Nathaniel’s alcohol cessation advice with the help of an enlightening flagon of ale.

Nathaniel had already left after unsuccessfully trying to persuade Arken to leave with him. Nathaniel had indicated that he would be at the academy for a couple more days until Monday evening when he would set out in pursuit of Kira…To do what, even Nathaniel seemed unsure of.

Observe? Protect? Abduct?

Arken took a detour on his way back to the academy, following a new route that led him past the Sleepy Kitten Inn.

He took care to remain in the shadows as he peered through the white lace curtains of the front windows. He caught a glimpse of Susie in a maid uniform—a pale pink dress with a knee-length skirt and white apron—making up a room. Her hair was tied back neatly, and she wore a faint smile as she straightened the room.

He wondered what she was thinking of.

He stood there for some time, watching her fold the corners of a double bed expertly. She worked there on Saturday evenings, he’d discovered. It occurred to him that it was a job she would have had to give up if she’d accepted his offer.

Had he known she worked, he would have offered her an allowance. But he supposed that wasn’t the point. He had an inkling that money was not Susie’s sole motivation in working; she seemed the sort who liked to keep busy.

Even now, as she moved on to wiping shelves and other surfaces in the room with a damp cloth, Arken felt it was safe to say that she was contributing more to society than he currently was. Doing the bare minimum had been his way of maintaining Henrikk’s vision without adding more cruelty to the academy’s practices.

It had never occurred to him to go against Henrikk’s wishes. The risks of displeasing the King had not seemed worth it.

Then again, doing nothing made his existence feel hollow.

He’d done so little for the students at Volmasque. Even a subtle rewrite of a school rule could have a significant impact on the students’ day to day life. It required little effort on his part. A simple announcement. A signature.

Henrikk wouldn’t notice.

But his spies would.

Arken chewed his lip in deliberation. It was difficult to concentrate, and no matter how hard he tried, his thoughts always drifted back to Susie. It had taken great restraint on his part not to find her at the academy and instigate another conversation. To not patrol the corridors in the hope of meeting her. To not visit her room, just so he could lay eyes on her.

His willpower was growing thin, which was why he allowed himself to stand outside the Sleepy Kitten Inn, watching her. He didn’t care that promenading couples gave him curious glances, but he did envy them as they continued past him along the river.

The sky, which had been cloudy all week, was clear. It was a little muggy, but there was the occasional fresh breeze that was inviting. He would have liked to walk along the river’s esplanade with Susie. Just to be near her, even if they didn’t hold hands.

He briefly fantasised about greeting her when she finished her shift and offering her his arm to escort her back to the academy. He let out a long sigh as the minutes passed.

The Sleepy Kitten Inn was a respectable establishment that looked considerably more refined than Ernie’s. It was located on a well-kept street of boutiques and office buildings, lined by rows of acacia trees. The shop windows were dark now, but the glow emanating from the inn caused the leaves to radiate a bright lime that reminded him of Susie’s eyes.

His heart sank. The last time she’d looked at him had been when she’d turned him down. Arken might have tried harder to persuade her, to negotiate, to pursue her, had he not seen the way she looked at him in that moment.

It was more than just pity.

She’d felt sorry for him.

After years of sharing that very sentiment with regards to himself, Arken was suddenly desperate to rise above it. He didn’t want her feeling sorry for him.

He wanted to be worthy of her, even if she never wanted anything to do with him. He didn’t want to see that expression when they met in the academy’s halls.

Maybe Nathaniel was right. He needed to get his act together.

There were so many obstacles in the way. The greatest one was himself. To change now when his survival strategy involved blocking out the world around him was daunting. And even if he did change for the better, then what? At the end of that arduous road was the unwavering law forbidding romantic feelings between vampires and other races.