Page 44 of And It’s Still You

“You coming down to eat with me and Ocean? I’m ’bout to order us some food.”

“I would, but I really need to get this done. My deadline is creeping up on me, and I don’t like feeling like I’m in a rush.”

We’d been eating together every night, so for her to decline felt off to me. I didn’t push it, though. I kissed her forehead and gave her space before going to find Ocean. He’d already washed up, so I ordered our food, making sure to get Moya something, and went to shower.

Twenty minutes later, Ocean and I were cuddled up on the couch, waiting for the food to arrive. He wanted to watch a movie, but I could hardly pay attention. My mind kept wandering to Onyx. Even though he had me heated, Moya’s words rang in my ears. It made me think back to my childhood. Since Angela was the primary parent, we didn’t see much of how the divorce affected Onyx. Whenever we were with him, he had to put on a mask because he always seemed like he was good. It was probably all a front, and I could bet all my money that he wasn’t good with his emotions because of my grandfather.

When the food arrived, Moya shocked me by coming down and joining me and Ocean at the table. I said grace over the food, and we dug in. Ocean done most of the talking while I kept stealing glances at Moya. In a way, it almost felt like she was avoiding me. She barely made eye contact with me, and when she did, it was brief. Whatever was going on in that mind of hers, I needed her to let me in sooner rather than later.

Once we were done with dinner, Ocean and I finished the movie while Moya went to shower. Ocean fell asleep halfway through, so I turned it off and took him to his bed. I sat in his room for a good twenty minutes before Moya texted me, asking me to come join her in bed.

“Now, where am I supposed to lay down?” I joked, seeing Moya in the middle of the bed with her phone in her face.

She glanced over at me, then looked from side to side and smirked. “There’s plenty of room for you, Shea.”

“All this bed, and you want to be right in the middle.”

“To be closer to you. This is a huge bed, and you’re not a big mover in your sleep. You’ll stay in one spot most of the night while I like to travel. The one time you switch positions is if you can’t feel me.”

“At least you know.”

I undressed down to my boxers and got in bed, immediately draping my arm around Moya’s stomach. Her hand went to my face as her hands absentmindedly stroked my beard. I glanced up to see she was deep into whatever book she was reading, so I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of being near her.

As I felt myself drifting off to sleep, I prayed over her. I prayed over us. I wasn’t sure what God was doing in our lives, but I didn’t want to be without Moya again. Feeling like she was pushing away felt heavy in my chest. I needed God to lighten that and reassure me that He’d given us a second chance. I believed we deserved it.

13

MOYA COLLIER

“We haven’t had a night like this in a long time,” Elise stated, pouring shots for us and bouncing on her toes. “I’m so excited to be doing this. It’s just like old times. Isn’t that right, baby?”

“Damn right.” Terrance cosigned. “I knew the day was coming. I just didn’t know when.”

“We both did.”

The way Terrance twisted his lips at Elise had me and Shea laughing.

“Don’t be trying to play innocent in front of Shea. You were the one hyping Moya up when she was yelling ’bout being single and shit.” Terrance called Elise out then turned to Shea. “I was trying to look out for you, man. I’ve always told you I believed you and Moya would get back together, so I was on the defensive side. Elise’s ass was trying to find yo’ replacement.”

“It was like that, Elise? You were my friend first. How you going to switch up on me like that?” Shea asked with his brow raised.

Elise wagged her finger. “Don’t be trying to guilt trip me. I was your friend first, and I’m still your friend, but we all know Moya is my girl. You’re the reason she is, so forgive me for trying to be a good friend.”

“Girl, don’t worry about them. You were doing exactly what you were supposed to do for me, and I appreciate you.” I reached over and tried to slap hands with Elise, but Terrance slapped her hand down. I burst out laughing at his dramatic ass. “Damn, Tee. You’re like a worrisome big brother.”

“Nah. Y’all can’t be doing all that in front of my boy.” He defended Shea.

“Your boy was having his needs taken care of, so I think he was all good,” I stated.

Shea chuckled. “And you were too, but we both know where our hearts were. Neither of us dated or went out looking for love. We knew where home was, but we were too stubborn to admit it. That’s neither here nor there, because look where we are now.”

Terrance tried to dap Shea up, but it was Elise’s turn to knock his hand down. The two of them started play fighting, so I turned my attention to Shea, who was side-eyeing me.

“Oh, don’t do that.” I giggled. “We’ve already had this conversation about needs. Don’t let Terrance put you back in your feelings.”

‘‘Who said I was in my feelings?”

“From the way you’re glaring at me and got that bottom lip poked out, it’s obvious.”