Page 30 of Built to Last

It was true. Helen had been the only person I could talk to back then, the only person remotely close to me who knew I was gay.

“The two of you ran into each other and rekindled the old flame, I assume?” she went on.

“I’ve been building a commercial property adjacent to the coffee shop he owns with his brothers,” I said. “We’ve been at each other’s throats all summer over it.”

“Yep,” Helen said, a note of triumph in her voice. “The old flame never died. It rocks that the two of you were brought back together by fate and that you’re going to rewrite the story to have the ending it always should have had.”

I frowned because my sister was way overdramatic. But the frown was only skin deep. Inside, I was relieved and hopeful and maybe even a little giddy.

Until I remembered the rest of the problem.

“If I start dating Gilbert, it will get out. Everyone around me will know, because I’m not making the same mistake of trying to have a secret relationship again. I want something better and long-lasting with Gilbert.”

“That’s wonderful,” Helen sighed, like she was already planning our wedding.

“My crew will find out,” I said before she could run away with things. “They might quit. I might end up with a bunch of jobs on my hands and no crew members to tackle them.”

“You can always hire more workers,” Helen said, irritating me because she wasn’t taking the whole thing seriously enough.

“Not like these guys,” I argued. “We’ve worked together for years. Finding a crew you can trust is essential in this business. And…and I like them. I consider them friends.”

“Oh, baby,” Helen sighed. “If they really are friends, you’re not going to lose them by coming out.”

Instinct screamed at me she was wrong and I could lose everything by upsetting the delicate balance of my life the way it was. But as we wrapped up the conversation with me still determined but not convinced I’d come out of the closet unscathed, Helen gave me a final piece of advice.

“I know attitudes are tough and weirdly regressive in this timeline we’re living through, but you’ve already lost Gilbert once because of fear. You’ve been down that path, and you know what the scenery looks like. Maybe it’s time to try the other path. And besides,” she added with teasing humor, “if it all does turn into a disaster, I’m sure someplace like Milwaukee needs a great construction company.”

I groaned and laughed at her little quip. Milwaukee had been an inside joke between the two of us since we’d been kids, watching old Laverne and Shirley reruns after school. Bringing that up put me in a good mood. We chatted a bit more about Christmas, then I told her I loved her and ended the call.

And then sat there, staring at the opposite wall of the RV, wondering if it was really worth it to give everything up for love or if that was just a fairy tale.

There really was only one way to find out. I couldn’t delay it or push it back, the way I had when I’d swapped around contractors to get the shop finished on time. It was better to blurt the truth out to the world between jobs instead of risking my entire crew abandoning me in the middle of the next job.

So on Monday, the day that the inspector was due to give the county’s final stamp of approval, officially ending the shop project, as Angela and I were standing alone on the sidewalk around the corner of Provisions, waiting for the inspector to arrive, I took the leap.

I cleared my throat, rolled my shoulders, then crossed my arms as the two of us stood there, light traffic driving by, fall leaves fluttering in the October breeze, everything primed and ready. “Um,” I started. “I wanted to mention something to you.”

“Oh yeah?” Angela asked, eyes scanning over the checklist on the clipboard she carried. “Mention away.”

I swallowed hard and glanced down the street towards the door of Common Grounds. Part of me prayed Gilbert would step out, smile at me, and help me through the potential disaster at hand.

I cleared my throat again and said, “I’m kind of maybe about to start possibly dating someone.”

Angela glanced up briefly with a pleased smile. “Good for you. I’ve always thought you were a catch and that it was a shame you were single. Who is it?”

My mouth was suddenly completely dry. I almost couldn’t form the words, but I had already started the ball rolling, and it was time to confess. “Gilbert Meyers,” I said, hugging myself tightly and waiting for the fallout.

Angela burst into the widest, brightest smile I’d ever seen from her. “I knew it!” she proclaimed. “You and Marco look cute together, but you and Gilbert have been circling each other all summer.” She laughed. “Darius owes me twenty bucks.”

My eyes went wide and I dropped my arms as I stared at her. “Wait, what?”

“We’ve been watching the two of you since we started this job,” Angela went on, still laughing. “The whole crew has bets on whether and when the two of you would get together, or whether you’d go for Marco. But that was a new twist in the last few weeks. I had my money on you and Gilbert hooking up the last week of the project, so I win.”

“Hold on. Back up a second.” I shook my head and waved my hands as I tried to wrap my brain around what she was telling me. “You were all betting on…on me and Gilbert getting together?”

“Sorry.” She looked suddenly sheepish. “It’s crass to make bets over your boss’s dating life, I know. But you and Gilbert have been so much fun to watch all summer that we couldn’t help it.”

I continued to gape at her, my brain still not catching up. “You all knew I was gay?” I kept my voice low, even though everyone apparently knew already.