Page 18 of The Summer Pass

“That’s hard to believe,” said Shan, and something about the way he said it made Lill think he did have a lot of experience, with both parts of it.

“Firuduna hasn’t made himself unpleasant, has he?” Zaraz asked anxiously.

“No—well, he’s annoying, but not like that.”

“Good. He made himself very unpleasant to us.”

“But not like that,” Shan added. “No, I know you think he did, darling, but he was fine, actually. We should explain how we came to meet him, Lill—explain properly. It might change your opinion of me, and—well, that would be fair, and you deserve to know. At the hostel where we work, we’re musicians mainly, but I sometimes entertain clients another way. Zaraz doesn’t, she never has, and I’m getting too old to have many men interested in me, so it’s only an occasional thing now.”

Lill nodded. He remembered that Arsha had pretended to have found him in a hostel, working at that kind of job. That was the only reason he knew what Shan was talking about.

“Firuduna was one of your clients?” he guessed.

“Going to be—we went upstairs to a room together—but he was very shy and couldn’t explain what he wanted, in words or signs. It was clear he’d never done anything like that before. And then when he was just starting to figure out how we might proceed … ” Shan shook his head. “It really would have been funny, if it hadn’t all turned out so badly. We heard shouting and running feet in the hall, and Firodunu throws open the door, and there’s Ruka running upstairs with an armload of stuff from his luggage—he’d left it downstairs in the public room, like a child—and Zaraz was chasing her, but Firo thought they were in it together and that we were all trying to rob him. Thought I was seducing him while the women robbed him, I guess.”

“Probably somebody told him that was what would happen if he went to a place like ours.”

“Nakhana said he’s divorced from his wife,” Lill offered. “I’ll bet there’s a story there. I almost … feel sorry for him.”

“I do feel sorry for him,” said Shan frankly. “Zaraz disagrees.” He smiled wryly at her.

“I feel sorry for him,” said Zaraz grudgingly. “I just feel a lot sorrier for us.”

“Of course!” said Lill. “What part of that story was meant to change my opinion of you, Shan?”

“The part where he sometimes takes payment for sex,” said Zaraz. “But it doesn’t, does it? Because you’re a sweetheart.”

“I’m—really not. But I don’t … think less of you or … ” He wasn’t even sure what it was they feared he would think.

“And what do you think of my idea of forming a troupe, then?”

“To go to Tagra Degra?” He only wished they could. He’d have done it in a heartbeat. “I don’t see how we can, with the bridge out. Besides, they’re likely to be under siege soon. I’m not sure that’s where you want to be.”

Lill lay awake that night wondering what they should do. It was by no means clear that it was safe to stay in Tsuruva if the Great King’s army was headed into the Summer Pass. The village had several fortified towers where its residents could shelter in the event of an attack, but they didn’t need extra lowlanders taking up space in them, and Lill thought they’d have been justified in pointing that out. Shan and Zaraz really would be better off going down to meet the army. They could entertain the soldiers to earn some money and then make their way home. They were terrified of the army, so he wouldn’t suggest it, but it did strike him as the obvious choice.

And for Lill himself? He had been a member of the Great King’s army since he was given as a votary to the Order of the Sworn Defenders when he was four years old. If he did not go down there and join the advancing force, he would betray his upbringing and his family. He would forfeit the protection of the Order against the blasphemies that he had committed in their name. He would be shamed forever.

He was already so deep in shame, so far beyond the limit of what the Order allowed, that it amazed him a little that he could still feel anything about this, but he did feel it. His place was with the Great King’s men marching up through Akramarra to besiege Vanu’s ancestral home. He could not return to the Order itself, but he could present himself as a member of it—they wouldn’t know he’d been expelled—and be given a mission.

The bridge over the Rakhiri was completely gone, but the river could still be crossed. Early the next morning, Lill went up the meadow and saw that they’d made a chain of boats across the water. He went to the village great house to see if he could hear news—or impart news, if no one else had noticed yet. A messenger from Tagra Degra was there when he arrived, with a summons from the Boar of Hawakhurta. He wanted Tsuruva to send men to help defend his stronghold.

So there it was: an invitation to cross the river to Tagra Degra. The gates of the fortress opening for them. The idea of walking into a potential siege still made Lill feel faintly queasy. The only knowledge applicable to siege warfare that he had was of how to infiltrate a fortress to help break a siege, and even that was only theoretical; he’d never been involved in any such action. He didn’t know what role he would play as part of a defending force. But the stronghold was in the control of an old friend of Vanu’s, apparently. Maybe even Vanu himself. Surely he could be useful in some way.

He brought the news back to the smithy first. Nakhana put down his hammer and wiped his face with his kerchief and made several signs about body parts of deities.

“I’ll go,” he said finally, addressing Lill. “But you’ve got to promise me you’ll stay and look after Ma and Firuduna and Aunt Dani for me.”

This stopped Lill in his tracks. Here was a role he had never envisioned for himself. He almost laughed and asked Nakhana if he was serious, but he realized that it made sense, from a certain perspective. As far as Nakhana’s knew, Lill was a reliable young man who had worked hard in his forge for the last month and a half but who clearly wouldn’t be any use in combat. And he’d spent the last week looking after Nakhana’s wounded cousin and must have done a pretty good job of it, because Firuduna certainly seemed happy with his care. Of course Nakhana would ask Lill to stay and be his deputy in the village.

“Of course I’ll stay,” Lill signed back. “Don’t worry.”

After all, if there was even a chance it was Vanu in Tagra Degra—Vanu with all of his household, all the people Lill missed most in the world—Lill could not think of showing his face there. He had left that home that could never really be his, and he was never going back.

Chapter 7

On the Road to Manáshta

Gurti couldn’t escape the feeling that they were running away. For herself, she wouldn’t have minded. She had thought about it, she knew it was what she needed to do, and after all, if it was the wrong choice, she could live with the consequences. She had done so before. But in the end she was bringing most of Lord Vanu’s household with her, and she was not sure that was right.