Page 31 of Dark Notes, Volume Two

I move over to Jett, he’s shivering from head to toe.

“Jett,” I say softly, trying to alert him to my presence but sound calm. I think if I’m not calm, this might not go well.

“You should not be here, Mia.”

I stop beside his bed and reach out to touch his arm, but he flinches like I disgust him. His words hit even harder.

“Did you think this was real?”

“Yes,” I admit quietly because I did, although I’m questioning it now.

Turning to me through chattering teeth, before quickly looking away, he says, “Samantha was right. Your week is up. I’m done.”

All the things he has said to me enter my mind, and it doesn’t match what he’s saying now.

“You said you wanted me to live with you.”

“I don’t.” He responds quickly.

“You said you’d protect me.”

“I won’t.”

“Goddamn it, Jett! Look at me. You said you loved me.”

He lifts his head and stares at me with watery eyes but it’s not tears, I think it’s another symptom.

“I lied. Didn’t you know? It’s what addicts do best.”

8

Chapter Seventeen

JETT

Mia runs out of the room crying, and the fucking pain in my chest is almost as bad as the constant ache in my bones. She was never supposed to see me like this. I could keep her if I could keep her away from certain parts of me. Today that became impossible, and I had no choice but to let her go. I was a fool to ever believe a fucked up piece of shit like me could have a woman like her. The sun has set on my time with my angel.

Now I need to get the fuck out of here. I’ve already called a buddy and he’ll be waiting in the parking lot. I’m hoping I can dodge Jagger because I really do not need to deal with his shit right now.

After pulling the IV from my arm, I get off the bed in my torn shirt and jeans. They ripped it apparently when they had to revive me in the ambulance, not once, but twice. Dying twice in a thirty-minute drive probably should be a wake up call, but I’m not going to fucking rehab. I’d rather die for good than go to some bullshit therapy nonsense. I’m a goddamn rockstar, this is my life and I’m aware I’ll burn out young. I know I’m going to die before I turn thirty, and I’m fine with it. With my past constantly haunting me, it’s really the only option.

Walking out the door, I casually move to the elevator hoping to not attract attention. I’m leaving and no one will stop me, but I don’t want any hassles. As my right leg trembles like a mother fucker, I walk into the elevator, spotting the back of Jagger’s head down the hall as he hugs Mia. I never meant to hurt her, but I know I did.

This is the only way, Angel.

I press the button to close the door and she sees me. Her eyes meet mine. Hers are filled with fury. Mine with regret. My chest squeezes so fucking hard it nearly brings me to my knees. I can’t breathe until the view of my future disappears. The future I wanted, not the one I deserve. My fantasy was to have it all, but not at the expense of breaking my Angel. It’s time to move on, the only way I know how.

By the time I make it to the front door, I can barely walk. My limbs shake as Jason rushes in and places his arm around my back. Helping me out of the hospital, he says, “Damn, you look rough, man.”

However, I look, I feel about a thousand times worse. My eyes are watering along with my nose, and I’m sweating fucking buckets. I haven’t been this sick in a long time because I always make sure I have drugs in my veins.

He helps me into the passenger seat and asks, “Want me to do it for you?”

“Yeah,” I answer, with a pained grunt. There is no way I could hold my hand steady enough. I might end up missing my vein and causing an abscess which would require draining and yet another fucking hospital stay.

He holds my arm and ties it off. As he places the lighter under the spoon, I groan audibly.

“Hurry the fuck up.”