Page 95 of Tempting My Mafia Monster

Riley had seen the list and cried. She begged me not to go after them. She told me I was finally free. No one was looking for me. I was dead. We had each other, and I had the chance to start over, to live a real life in the real world. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her I’d never be free in a world where these men still lived and breathed. Instead, I agreed to go to Australia with her just so she’d stop crying. I also didn’t want to leave her alone with Nolan, so I had little choice.

But they were just words. I wanted to mean them, yet I didn’t.

A shadow fell over me, and I glanced up to find Nolan standing beside the bench, his hands in his jeans pockets. He said something, and I lifted one headphone off my ear.

“Can I sit?”

“Rather you didn’t.”

“I can stand.”

“Do whatever the fuck you want.”

He sat at the furthest point on the bench from me. I glanced up and saw the curtain in the apartment twitch, Riley clearly spying on us to make sure I didn’t attempt murder again.

“I know what you’re thinkin’. And I don’t blame you.”

“And what the fuck am I thinkin’?”

“Revenge. That you can’t start over while your past haunts you. You deserve to end McKenna.”

“I do. After everything, that’s all I want. I made a promise to Da that I’d make him pay and send him to hell. I’m gonna keep that promise, even if it’s the last thing I ever do.”

“I get it. But it’s not a good idea to go after him right now,” he sighed, lowering his cap. “I don’t know if Sean is even still alive after Soraya stabbed him. If he is, he thinks you’re dead. You have the element of surprise, but you don’t have the connections or the resources to reach him. After what happened, he will have maximum protection around him. Going alone, you won’t stand a chance.”

I turned to look at him, narrowing my eyes. “But you do. You have the connections. Is that what you’re sayin’? We do this together.”

“No.” He shook his head. “I don’t want to die. If I go back to Ireland, I’ll never make it out alive. All I want is to protect your sister and get us as far from McKenna as possible.”

I shut the journal and rolled my lips.

“Lauren—Riley would kill me if I didn’t tell you to get on that plane with us tomorrow. She loves you, and she’s only just got you back.”

“But you won’t.”

He smiled, folding his arms. “I think we both know that if you board that plane, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”

I stared at my trainers, feeling the sharp pain in my chest intensify as the truth of those words sank in. “I can’t leave her. I have to know she’s safe.”

“Who?”

I looked at him with confusion. “Riley.” Who else would I be talking about?

Nolan’s green eyes softened, and he nodded. “Riley will be safe. I’ll make sure of it. I know you only have my word to go on, but if you choose to come with us, you’ll see I’ll do everythin’ in my power to make her happy. I really do love her.”

I ran my hand down my face and groaned. He stood up.

“Here’s the last I’ll say on it…” He met my gaze and dropped his smile. “You think revenge is the only thing chainin’ you to this life. That it’s the only thing you have left to live for.”

My jaw tightened.

“Maybe it was a few months ago,” he continued. “But I don’t think that’s all this is anymore.”

“The fuck would you know?”

“A lot more than you think. Right now, more than you do.”

I looked away, staring across the street at a couple walking hand in hand, sharing an ice cream.