Page 33 of You’re So Vein

So why did he run away?

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At Sanctus Estate, we love democracy. After all, one of the finest vintages in our collection is a genuine Athenian philosopher! Sanctus residents are invited to a campaign masquerade at Brimstone – come for the blood cocktails, stay for the lively political debate!

This is your opportunity to chat with the top two mayoral candidates about what’s truly important to the vampire community: instituting a coffin-maker’s appreciation day, getting rid of that late-night bus route with the loud horn that disrupts our early evening strolls, or perhaps restoring the maypole dance to its original pagan blood-soaked glory.

Three honoured guests from the Conclave will be joining us, and they’re excited to hear your ideas about improving life for all vampires. Perhaps we’ll even see our candidates accept one of their challenges. It promises to be quite the evening!

Dress to distress. Masks mandatory. All swords, maces and medieval siege weapons must be checked at the door (Alaric, this means you).

Gideon & Arabella

113 Dig This 23 Resurrections

11Augustin

Gideon: He dog-eared the pages of your personal grimoire.

He spilled a goblet of vintage blood on your favourite white shirt.

He photobombed your oil portrait.

He told everyone at court that you have fang veneers.

C’mon, Augie, tell me why you hate di Sangro. Alaric might be able to deal with you keeping secrets, but not me!

I’m going to keep guessing until I annoy it out of you.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” HANNAH leans over the table, peering upside-down at the book open in front of me. She munches on a warm slice of garlic pizza bread.

“What does it look like? I’m reading.” I turn the page, my gaze skittering over elaborate woodcut images of vampires emerging from graves while terrified villages look on, swords raised.

Truthfully, I’m struggling to keep my focus on the book. I keep remembering dancing with a certain infuriating councilwoman last night, and the way her hair felt like silk whenever it fell over my shoulder.

But I’m not thinking about those red knickers.

Not at all.

“I’ve never seen you read a book like that before.” She traces her finger around a dancing demon. “Your books usually have more flowers and fewer severed heads.”

“This is a book of magic. Specifically, it contains protection spells and simple folk remedies that use vampire blood. I took it from the Dusk Court library when I left.”

“You stole a library book?” Hannah looks scandalised. “Aren’t you worried about the fines?”

“Absolutely. Why do you think we live in secret in the woods? Librarians terrify me. I still have nightmares about the one who shushed me in 1891.” I turn a page. “I’m looking for something that might cure my stomach issues.”

“When I have a stomach ache, you take me to a doctor.”

“Yes, but that’s because the doctor can fix you. They can’t fix me because I’m not supposed to get sick.”

I place my hand over my stomach, which churns wildly. It’s been even worse ever since Komal and I danced at her parents’ house. Judging by the male genitalia she’s drawn on my campaign posters, she seems to have recovered from her panic attack in the stationery cupboard. (Although, after studying her artwork, I’m slightly concerned about her knowledge of anatomy…) Which leaves me in the unfortunate situation of being ill with some mysterious malaise and having my rival knowing intimate details about my vampire life, details which she might use against me at any moment.

Why did I tell her so much? Why did I think that would have any impact on her? I can’t answer that question. All I know is that I started talking and drawing circles on her back, the way I used to do with Hannah when she had nightmares, and her muscles unclenched and her breathing steadied, so I kept talking, and before I knew it, I’d told Komal about my parents, about Isabelle…

… and now I can’t stop thinking about Komal’s red underwear and perfectly formed thighs, and my stomach squirms, and my heart wants to leap out through my nostrils…

“You’d better be feeling better tomorrow,” Hannah says. “Because you promised me my birthday shopping trip.”