Page 32 of You’re So Vein

It’s then I realise that my favourite red skirt has ridden up my thighs.

Right up.

Thankfully, none of our spectators can see what Augustin sees from his angle, which is… everything. His eyes bug out of his head as he gets a full frontal of my red lacy knickers.

He blinks. And blinks and blinks. And then his nose wrinkles and his whole face collapses into a wobbly frown.

Great. Good to know that I disgust him. I love that for me.

I yank my skirt down and glare at him. “I thought you were Victorian. Shouldn’t you be averting your eyes or fetching the smelling salts at the sight of a lady’s petticoats?”

“Ladies in my era tended not to perform complex dances in skirts that barely reach their knees.” He brushes grass from his shirt, not meeting my gaze. “The issue never came up.”

“That explains why you look like you’ve just had a heart attack.”

He nods, his features a picture of misery. He presses his hand to his stomach and still refuses to look at me. “Councillor Ahuja, I assure you that my gaze will henceforth be directed only at the ceiling, the floor, or your rather judgemental eyebrows.”

“My eyebrows are not judgemental—”

Augustin attempts another spin and smacks himself in the nose. The aunties roar with laughter.

“Handsome and enthusiastic!” Priya shouts.

“He’s trying so hard, na? So cute!”

I perform a flawless spin, but the crowd barely notices. They’re too busy cooing as Augustin attempts to clap overhead like he’s battling an invisible swarm of insects.

The music ends in a triumphant flourish. I strike my final pose, draped over Augustin’s arm, while he wobbles in place, looking panicked and slightly confused and still trying to avoid looking at me.

The entire party erupts in applause.

My family surge forward to surround… Augustin. Papa claps Augustin’s shoulder while the aunties hold up their scorecards.

“Amazing!” Mamma says. “Augustin wins!”

“What?! Are you serious?”

“Beta, don’t be jealous,” Papa scolds with a laugh. “He danced with so much heart.”

“He danced like a malfunctioning scarecrow!”

Augustin stands bone-still, blinking and blinking like he can’t quite believe it. Such a fake. And they’re all falling for him. The aunties swoop in, leaning in for selfies. Sunita places a glittery scarf around his neck. I can’t bear to watch, so I turn away.

He stalks past me, long arms flailing as he ducks to avoid more aunties.

“Where do you think you’re going?” I bellow.

“I’m leaving.”

“Why? Don’t you want to stay and humiliate me some more? Steal more votes from my community?”

He presses his hand into his stomach, his eyes meeting mine briefly, the irises blown out, dark as midnight. “I… don’t feel so good.”

“Coward!” I yell at his retreating figure. “I thought vampires didn’t get sick.”

He slips out the gate without answering, disappearing into the night.

I flop down on an outdoor sofa, no longer in a partying mood. He got exactly what he wanted. Augustin-bloody-Durant won over my family. My community.