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Easy peasy.

No one’s ever going to question his judgment if she becomes his wife.

But if anyone were to see me and Ruel?

Even worse, if this somehow turns into a reality show, and people are asked to vote between me and Sadie on who’s going to be the next Mrs. Ruel Caristia?

Me, with my frizzy hair, not-slender body, not-high IQ⁠—

“C-Can you cover for me?” I hear myself choke out.

“Oh, sure—” Gwen is looking at me in concern. “You do look pale. Are you alright?”

“Um yeah, totally.” I can’t make myself meet her gaze as I utter the lie. “I just…I just forgot something in my room.” I can feel Gwen's worried gaze following me as I pull off my wet gloves and hurry out. By the time the kitchen doors swing shut behind me, I'm already hyperventilating⁠—

It’s okay, it’s okay.

You just need some air.

You’ll be fine.

I say the words again and again as I stumble toward the staff quarters at the back of the club. My knees are shaking so bad I’m worried they’re about to give way any moment.

C’mon, Kar.

Hang in there.

You can do it.

But even as I say this, I’m also opting to take the shortcut through the gardens. I really feel like I’m this close to falling, and I’m just scared that when I do, I won’t have any way of getting up. Tears have started to make my vision blurry, and I can barely see the roses around me, much less the fountain up ahead where there’s a couple⁠—

No.

A really familiar couple⁠—

No.

No.

No.

My steps crash into a silent halt and my heart makes no noise either as it starts breaking anew.

That’s Sadie.

I know I can’t be mistaken.

That’s Sadie, alright, and she’s kissing…

Him.

Chapter 10

Not That, Please

Ican't sleep.

Every time I close my eyes, I see it. The fountain. The roses. Sadie up on her toes with her arms around his neck.