Page 24 of The Gods Order

“I don’t know.”

None of us speak as she shakes her hands out and rearranges herself in her seat. I study every move she makes—the way she rolls her shoulders, crosses and tucks her legs beneath her.

This has caused her deep emotional distress.

I’m quite upset with the God of Boundaries.

“Amick and I were talking in the shower, and I’ve realized that I—we—need to have a conversation with him. And, Kyzen, I could really use your help with how to start.”

“You can have anything you need from me, little goddess.”

She blushes, and I tilt my chin in approval. Perfect answer.

She smiles down at her plate as she pushes her fork in circles. After a moment, she stops toying with her food and laces her fingers together.

“I’m…struggling,” she says so low I barely hear her. I do hear her soft admission, though. So do my brothers. We each lean closer. “I know myself well enough to know that if I shove all this down like I desperately want to and pretend I’m fine, it’ll rot inside me until it becomes something ugly. But I—”

She cuts herself off with a groan and flicks her gaze up to the ceiling. She blinks repeatedly. I’m not sure if she’s trying to gather her thoughts or fight off the emotions.

Regardless, I don’t interrupt. My soul caresses hers and her shoulders sag. When she straightens again, to my surprise, she doesn’t focus on my brothers or me.

Iric shifts in his seat and raises his brow. She nods.

I notice the change in her immediately when his power brushes across her skin. She lets out another slow breath, her body relaxing. Her gaze roams over each of us.

“After Iric and I spoke, I decided mentally and emotionally I was done with my parents. I didn’t care if they returned or if they were even…alive. It was a dark thought, but it was my truth. Now that I’ve seen him, heard his voice, been close enough to almost smell him, that feeling is gone. But that doesn’t mean I’m ready to reconcile our relationship. I’m not.”

“You don’t have to be ashamed of that thought, angel,” Riven says without a hint of teasing. “Everyone—well, almost everyone—at this table has had the same thought about their parents.”

Several grunts of agreement echo around the table, and she nods, more to herself than to us.

“You also don’t have to have anything to do with them. Your father, Consequence, or your mother,” Kyzen adds, squeezing her hand.

“Gods, my mother. I’ve barely begun thinking about her. The thoughts I have revolve around what she’s the goddess of.”

That’s…a very good question. One I haven’t considered.

“I don’t have the answer to that, but I do know…”

Doren trails off as all of us snap our attention his way.

“Maybe not right now. Let her finish first,” Yemi whispers, linking their fingers.

I’d like to hear what he has to say.

“Actually, Doren, I’d like you to continue. It’ll give me a minute to get my mind right,” Thayla says.

He nods, though the frown on his face doesn’t lessen.

“I had no clue the God of Consequence was involved with your life like this. I’ve met him three times. Two of those you know about—when he triggered the Goddess of Seduction’s Binding and gave me the key. The first time, before both of those, was when he appeared on the shores of the Lost Sea as Alamar and I were planning my death. I still don’t know how he caught wind of our plan, but he showed up, expressed the consequences of my actions, then left. I swear that’s all I’ve known.”

“Well, obviously the Messenger told him about your plan,” she says.

His mouth gapes, then his shoulders slump. “That’s more than likely exactly how.”

“That’s not all you’ve known, though, dear Discovery,” Riven says, tilting his head as he eyes Doren. “When Thayla first met you, she asked if you knew where her parents were and if you’d tell her.”

That he did. That detail has long since been buried beneath everything else we’ve had to process.