Page 19 of Sex On A Plate

Pour chicken broth into empty Ro*Tel can you set aside. Dump this into the skillet with the pureed Ro*Tel. Add another 1/2 can of chicken broth. Keep the can.

Bring this mixture to a low boil.

Add oil to second skillet. Dump 1-1/2 cans of the long grain wild rice into to the skillet. Heat until it changes color (roughly 6-8 minutes). During this 6-minute window of nothingness, chop up the 2 jalapenos (very fine). Chop up the garlic (4 cloves).

Add minced jalapenos to the rice mix. Add the garlic. Cook until both are soft-ish (3 minutes). Reduce heat to simmer.

Add boiling Ro*Tel and broth mixture to the rice and jalapeno mixture. Stir with your little rubber spatula until it’s mixed well.

Make sure you remembered to add sauce to the rice, and not the rice to the sauce, as the sauce was boiling, and the rice was on simmer. If you followed directions, the skillet one the stove is now starting to simmer.

Cover and let simmer until the rice absorbs all the moisture. This will be about 20 minutes, tops. Remove the lid. If the moisture’s absorbed, stir well, cover again, and set aside.

In 10 minutes remove the lid and fluff it up.

Plop a few healthy spoons of this rice onto your plate (beside a pile of the pork), grab a few tortillas, and get to eating.

Guess what?

There’s not one fucking place in Naples, Florida that serves Chili Verde. Not good Chili Verde, or bad Chili Verde. It’s not available.

I can throw a fucking rock to Cuba from my house, and there’s not one motherfucker in this town (other than me) that makes this shit.

Un. Fucking. Believable.

Make this shit and open a restaurant in your town. Call it “China Tu Madre” and they’ll come running.

Haha.

Enjoy.