Page 96 of Weddings, Revenge & Fake Dating

“You know, the space between the nacho balls and nacho ass.”

“If I’m lucky enough to enjoy nachos again,” I say sadly.

“Don’t be too loud when you make up. I’m tired.” She yawns, stands, and heads toward her room.

Facing my room door, I pause.

I’ve been stubborn and scared. I’ve been ignoring what my heart’s been telling me since I met Nathan. When we’re together, it feels right, and by all accounts, he’s a good guy. Well, good in the non-wedding-crashing kind of way.

There’s only one thing standing in my way. Myself.

I make myself a promise. From here on out, I will follow my heart. All I must do is be brave and meet Nathan halfway. Sure, there’s a possibility it may not work out, but what if it does? What if we do?

My heart flutters at the possibilities.

With the new resolution made, I step through the door to find my future. Hopefully, it includes Nathan’s nacho.

43/

nathan

Scared Shirtless

The tension in the room shifts when Jeanie steps inside.

With her here, I shove clothes into my duffel bag with clipped movements. I can’t help it; I’m feeling helpless. In my heart, I know Jeanie wants me as much as I want her. But she’s too damn scared to admit it, which makes this more frustrating.

For Jeanie, I remove all traces of myself except for Mini Wolf. He’s sprawled on the hotel bed, staring at the ceiling. He fits in with the random Halloween masks, cosplay costumes, shark sandals, and disco-party items that litter the room. All the crazy pieces somehow embody her cutesy awkwardness.

God, I’ll miss her.

“You want me to go with you to talk to Sophia?” I ask without facing Jeanie. Though I care about their relationship, in this moment my motives are purely selfish. What I want is to remain in her presence for as long as she’ll allow it, even if it’s only a few seconds more.

“Probably best if I go alone in the morning. She’s in the bridal suite by herself tonight. One more night of happiness before I ruin it.” Jeanie sighs.

Her response stings, but their chat has nothing to do with me. I remind myself she doesn’t need me anymore.

“You’re a good sister.” Jeanie is loyal to everyone she cares about. I wish I were one of the lucky ones.

Since my mom left, I promised myself I’d never let another woman wreck me, but here we are. Then again, I begged Jeanie to destroy me, and I’d let her do it again and again. And I’d say thank you every single time.

When I’ve stalled as long as possible, I zip my duffel bag, grasp the handles, and let it slide off the mattress. My arm muscles strain at the weight. Still, it’s nothing compared to the sharp, overwhelming pain piercing my heart when our gaze meets.

I inhale slowly and take all of her image in one last time. Even in her hot-mess state, Jeanie is beautiful.

Perhaps for support, she swipes Mini-Wolf from the bed and hugs him to her chest. He slumps forward, somehow deflated from her extensive use. I’ve never been jealous of a toy, but I am right now. Fiercely.

Her arms should be wrapped around me. Better, we should be wrapped around each other.

Is it wrong I want to fuck the ever-loving fear out of her, only so she’ll see I’m not like the other men in her life? I would never hurt her. I’ve only ever wanted to worship her.

“I’ll have my team send you a replacement.” By all accounts, our worlds will never collide again.

I cross the room, even though everything about this moment feels wrong. The thing is, Jeanie’s the only one who can change the trajectory of our current paths. I’ve already said my piece. I told her I want her. Full stop.

“Nothing could ever replace you,” she whispers.

I pause at the door. My free hand fists and flexes at my side. It aches because it will never touch her again.