Page 88 of Never the Same

Alex caught my eyes as I hovered near the C-17 as air force operators wrapped up loading the plane with pallets of cargo, coiled fueling hoses, and more. A few airmen in fatigues did maintenance checks, clipboards in hand, ear protection slung around their necks.

It wouldn’t be the most comfortable ride for Hollis compared to what she was used to, but it was safe and worked on short notice.

Keeping a tight grip on the leash so Ranger wouldn’t launch like a missile outside the hangar and onto a runway, I turned toward the open door. There were two other C-17 Globemasters looking Hulk-ish alongside Owen’s matte-gray Gulfstream-style jet. His brother’s name was painted on the side, the one he’d lost years back.

At the feel of a vibration from my back pocket, I faced the inside of the hangar, preparing to go for my phone. At the sight of Alex on approach, I held off.

I peered at Ranger as his ears perked up at every slight noise and movement around him. From the radio chatter to the shuffling of boots on the concrete, to the slamming of a hangar door—too much stimulation for him to process and not want to bark up a storm. I was still working on his training.

“Is it weird that my wife’s ex-husband is going to protect her while I’m gone?” Alex folded his arms, standing next to me.

“I’m sure Trevor would like to operate with us, but his priority will always be his kid and the mother of his child.”

“I don’t disagree. I wouldn’t let him come with us even if he wanted to. I just feel like I should be getting on that plane to DC with them instead.”

“I’m sure no one will go after Audrey as leverage to be used against Hollis,” I said, doing my best to reassure him. “Hell, they let Hollis go, so why attack now? Audrey and Chase will be just fine while we’re gone. Audrey wants you with us, don’t forget. She needs her best friend back.” I cleared my throat. “You know, her memories back.” Those memories and Hollis’s past were a sore subject for me after what had happened between us today.

“True, and they’re all staying with President Bennett’s son, and his wife is Secret Service,” he said as Ranger went on his hind legs, barking at something.

I calmed him down, crouching next to him. “They’re going to be better protected than we could do ourselves. No offense.”

“None taken, it’s what I need to hear,” he replied, taking a knee to help me with the Maligator, a.k.a. Ranger.

“We’re lucky we report to POTUS and the secretary of defense directly now and have their teams of Tier One operators on our side in times of emergency.” I stood once Ranger had finally chilled out.

Alex rose, arms back over his chest as he tried to pull off casual and asked, “How are you feeling about this trip, though?” He had to be doing his damnedest not to be direct and ask why both Hollis and I had been wet when he and Ryder had stopped by earlier. I knew he also wanted to ask my thoughts on this mystery guy Hollis had allegedly been with in Rome. I was grateful he was respecting my boundaries for once and not pushing.

“I’m worried about what Gideon learned that spooked him enough to demand an in-person meeting. Also, neutral territory my ass. That’s not why he chose The Sapphire.” I decided to stick to operator mode, to not give Alex the go-ahead to take a meat cleaver to my mind and mess me up right now.

“You think Gideon needs help? Not just ours, but Carter’s? The League’s?”

“I don’t know what to think,” I said as Hollis turned to the side and made eye contact.

I stared at her in a daze, my head landing back in my bedroom, still shocked I’d somehow gotten out of my own damn way in trying to be happy. It had been divine intervention that it’d happened. Or maybe insanity. All I knew was, instead of running, I opened the door wide. Only for her would I do that. Was it still reckless to do? Possibly.

She didn’t know who she was, and there could still be another guy from her past . . . but back in my bedroom, with her eyes on mine and my hands on her, it suddenly hadn’t mattered.

I hung my head, looking away from her as guilt caught up with me. “I still have to tell her the truth about my past.”

“What about your past?”

Shit. Had I spoken out loud? “Nothing.” I went for my phone when it vibrated three more times. My mother. Perfect timing. “Do me a favor, take Ranger over to the others? He’ll behave for Chase.”

“Sure.” He nodded, then took the leash from me.

I waited for them to walk away before dealing with my mother’s texts.

Mom: Your dad really needs you. He’s not doing well.

Mom: I need you, too.

Mom: I relapsed. Stress, you know? Planned to have only one drink last night. It turned into six.

Mom: Come to an AA meeting with me?

I became physically ill at her words. It’d taken years and years, not to mention a small fortune, to get her off drugs. But after only a year of being clean, she’d turned to the bottle as a substitute while I’d been deployed.

I had no idea what to text her. I could only handle so much. I had a new war in front of me. Unresolved battles still lingering in my past.