Page 61 of We Shouldn’t Do This Again

“When I’m with you, everything makes sense. You make me laugh, you make me furious like nobody else can, and you make me feel alive. It’s like you wake up parts of me that have been asleep for years, parts only you know how to reach. And I know this is complicated, that we both have entire lives waiting for us out there… but when I look into your eyes, when you touch me like this, when you kiss me this way… everything else disappears. I love you so much it hurts, Lidia. So much that sometimes I think I’d rather shatter into a thousand pieces than lose you again.”

For several seconds that feel endless, Lidia says nothing, as though she’s trying to absorb every single word. She only looks at me intensely, her eyes full of tears and that expression blending fear, happiness, and love—that love that has patiently waited for us to find our way back to each other somewhere in the world.

Then she gently presses her forehead against mine and closes her eyes as though she wants to keep this moment forever before whispering:

“My Barbara…”

And the instant I hear those words, I realize nothing else matters. Even if everything is about to explode, even if I’ll have to pay an impossibly high price for this happiness, I know every second is worth it. Because she is my home, the place I’ve always wanted to return to. And after years apart, I have no intention of letting her go. No intention of losing her again.

The water keeps rocking us gently, as though the sea itself wants to protect our secret a little longer, as though it understands how important this moment is to us. I close my eyes and hold her tighter, feeling her heartbeat against mine, fast and strong, perfectly in sync with my own.

“I love you, Lidia. And even if tomorrow everything becomes complicated, tonight you are mine and I am yours, with everything that means.”

CHAPTER 31

SWEET MOMENTS WITH YOU

Lidia

I wake up feeling heavy, though it’s not exhaustion weighing me down. It’s a sensation that begins right in the center of my chest and slowly spreads through every inch of my skin, as if everything that happened last night awakens again with every breath I take. I don’t open my eyes right away. I don’t want to break this moment, so fragile and so perfect. I want to savor everything I feel: the warmth clinging to my skin and the scent surrounding me—hers, mine, and the sea’s.

“I can’t believe this is happening to me…” I think. I take a deep breath and, unable to help myself, I smile. That fear that used to tighten around my heart is gone. There are no more doubts, or at least not enough to overshadow what I’m feeling—this whirlwind of emotions filling me to the brim and making me feel alive in a way I had forgotten. It all feels so real I think my heart might burst. I slowly open my eyes. Morning light pours through the window, drawing golden lines across the bungalow’s warm white walls while the sound of the sea—steady and serene—fills the silence.

I’m alone in bed, but I don’t feel alone for a second. I slide my hand slowly across the sheets, searching for her trace, and I find it immediately: in the scent lingering on the fabric, in the memories running over my skin, and in that warmth flooding me when I close my eyes and remember what it feels like to have her hands sliding down my waist, her mouth exploring every inch of my neck. A shiver runs up my spine as I remember the way her fingers lost themselves between my legs and how our moans tangled together until we both touched the stars.

“Oh my God…” I murmur to myself, letting my head fall back onto the pillow as a soft, lingering sigh escapes deep from my soul. What we’re doing is crazy, yes, but it’s the best kind of crazy I’ve ever lived through. I sit up slightly in bed, letting the sheet slip down my body. It’s just her and me here, and this bubble built only for us, a refuge where the outside world can’t reach us and every second feels eternal and ours.

I hear the door open, and my heart skips a beat.

“Good morning… are you awake yet?”

The moment I see her, I smile. Barbara is wearing a light T-shirt clinging to her body and shorts hugging her ass and showing off her strong, tanned legs. She looks incredible, and no matter how much time passes, she still sets me on fire.

“Where were you?” I ask, unable to hide the smile slipping onto my lips—that smile that appears on its own whenever she’s near.

She walks toward me slowly, as if this moment belongs completely to her, as if I belong to her too in a way neither of us can deny anymore. Leaning over the bed with that effortless ease I love so much, she answers calmly:

“I woke up really early and went for a run. I didn’t want to wake you; you looked so peaceful…”

I nod but don’t say anything else. Because her closeness distracts me, because her lips are too close to mine, and because the second she kisses me, the rest of the world stops making sense. It’s a soft, warm kiss, the kind that needs no rush, the kind that says, “I’m still here, I’m still with you, don’t be afraid.” I lose myself in it completely, giving myself to her without hesitation, letting the world shrink down to just us, to this meeting of lips filling me with warmth that rises from my stomach and settles in my chest. I feel her hand against my cheek, featherlight, and my skin tingles all over, reminding me how much I need her, how much I love her.

“You could’ve woken me up,” I murmur against her lips, my voice still rough with sleep and with the desire already stirring awake again. “We could’ve worked out together… something that would really leave us breathless.”

I leave the sentence hanging deliberately, paired with a mischievous half-smile I know she understands perfectly. She catches it immediately, but instead of playing along like I expect, she pulls back just enough to look into my eyes and gives me one of those smiles that lately reaches straight into my soul, making me feel vulnerable and strong all at once.

“We can save the workout for another time,” she says, brushing her nose against mine in a gesture full of affection. “I have a much better idea. Something we’ll both enjoy even more.”

I furrow my brow and raise an eyebrow curiously, my heart speeding up just from being with her like this.

“Oh really? Tell me. Now I’m intrigued.”

“A walk around the island,” she replies in that voice that could convince me of absolutely anything. “No rush. No schedules. Just you and me, enjoying the day however we want, stopping wherever we feel like, and letting time pass on its own.”

My smile widens, broad and sincere, because the idea fills me with a warmth that melts me from the inside out.

“I love that idea. Seriously. And it’ll keep us busy until we meet up with my dad and Miriam.”

“You’re right. Today’s their fitting,” she reminds me.