Page 37 of Guarding Glenda

Leigh stared down at me, one of his hands at my hip as the other worked me. My eyes closed as I breathed heavily.

“Open,” he said.

Cracking my eyes open, I focused on him. Those intense eyes soaked me up as he brought me close to the edge, then slowed. Something about the way he watched me drowned out everything else. All the fucked up things that night. The fact that Reggie was in the room. The fact that I hadn’t gotten off once all night, but was about to explode just from his tactical touch.

He pulled his fingers out and my pussy clenched around nothing. A small whimper escaped me but it wasn’t long before I was filled back up.

I gasped at his size, but he took his time, working small thrusts until he was inside me to the hilt. Once his cock was fully there, he stopped, staring down.

My hands went to his sides, pulling him closer. His belly met mine and he dipped his head down again for an intoxicating kiss. As his tongue explored my mouth, his hips began moving. I matched his pace and my fingers dug into his sides.

He already had me so close to the edge, I couldn’t hold on much longer. He held my hips in a way that made him stroke all the right places deep inside.

He quickened his pace and we both panted as our skin slapped. Still gripping my hip one with hand, he moved his other to rub my clit. Tiny mewls came from my throat as my pussy pulsed around him.

My legs shook as they tightened around him but he kept the same pace and rhythm until I relaxed my legs. Then he took four quick pumps and grunted, holding me as he filled the condom.

I was in my post orgasm-haze, staring up at those dark eyes, feeling his weight on me, when the trance was broken.

“Was that good, baby?” Reggie asked.

I bolted upright in the bed. Sweat poured from me. My shirt stuck to my skin and I couldn’t stand the feel of it.

Yanking it over my head, I slammed it to the ground as I trembled. Looking over at the alarm clock on the nightstand, it was the middle of the night. The little window of time when the bar was quiet and everyone slept.

But I couldn’t handle being in that room alone. The walls were closing in on me and I was so hot. As I struggled to catch my breath, I climbed off the bed and grabbed a bottle of water from the mini fridge.

As I peeled my jeans off, I tossed them where I’d left my shirt then grabbed the water, drinking it down.

It was real. That wasn’t just a dream. It wasn’t a misplaced memory. I’d tried to forget it because of the absolute fuckery of that night. But now that the floodgates were open, more things started flooding back. The day Leigh left the clubhouse. The strain between Reggie and me, but not even from that night. Something had shifted in him. He wasn’t at the clubhouse as much. I had suspicions of another woman, which was stupid considering how many times I’d known he was with other women, but something about them being part of the club made it somehow digestible. A lot of the guys had lots of women. It was just the way it was. But then why sneak around?

Opening the wardrobe, I grabbed my cut, not pulling it from the hanger but just looking at it. Months leading up to Reggie’s death, something was wrong. He was bad on drugs. He was pretty fucked up the night he’d let half the clubhouse have me. But it got worse. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he started going missing for hours. The guys all were hush hush. But I started to wonder if they didn’t know where he was, either.

Everything came to a head the night I told him I was pregnant. All that time he’d been short, dismissive, and placating. He brushed it all off as club business. But that night, after I’d known for weeks and hadn’t had a chance to tell him, I finally blurted it out. He exploded. He called me a liar. Said it was probably one of the other guys.

“I haven’t been with anyone but you!” I sobbed.

He gripped my face hard. “I watched you fuck nearly all my brothers, and you liked it.”

“I did it for you! I only did it because you said to!”

He shoved me away, throwing his hands up.

I ran to him as he tried to leave and grabbed the collar of his cut. “Listen to me. That was months ago. I just found out, Reggie. It’s yours. It’s you. It’s just you!” I cried.

But he turned and grabbed my wrists. “Don’t grab me.”

“Reggie, why are you doing this?” Tears streamed down my face. “You told me you loved me. You gave me a patch!”

“Maybe I made a mistake.”

Then he shoved my wrists. As I stumbled back, he left, slamming the door.

I knew he was strung out. He was just fucked up and got angry. But then the next day, Hammer told me he was gone. Within the week, intense cramps came on and the bleeding started. Everything I wanted was gone in such a short time. I just knew that if he got clean, things would be better. When I found out we’d have a family, I thought maybe it would open his eyes, help him get back to the man before. But was he ever the man I thought? Or did I fall trap to just falling for what I wanted him to be?

Pacing the room in my underwear, I racked my brain trying to string things together; to remember something that would help it all click. None of it made sense. Then I remembered what Leigh said. He yelled at Bama about not telling me what happened.

Loud thunder snapped me out of my spiral. I walked to the window and pulled the curtain aside. The glow of the outside lights illuminated small branches and dust whipping around from blustery wind before a bolt of lightning lit up the sky. It was getting nasty out there. But for the first time in as long as I could remember, things were clear.