Page 30 of I Love You, It’s Ruining My Life

It was a relief when Cassidy asked to go to a sleepover the night of Noah’s latest Broadway opening, and I needed the distraction. I needed some time by myself to figure out what to say to her. The drive hadn’t done much to help my thoughts, but seeing the lights and hustle and bustle of the city instantly distracted me as I made my way to Noah’s penthouse apartment.

What I hadn’t expected was the bundle of nerves I’d be met with the moment my brother opened the door. His hair was in disarray, sweat lined his brow, and his clothes were wrinkled – Noah typically was the epitome of grace and seriousness; I couldn’t remember the last time he'd looked like this.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, coming in to find the place a mess. Clothes were everywhere, and long-abandoned takeout boxes sat on the table. It was like stepping into an alternate reality where Noah’s meticulous cleaning had been replaced by Jack’s chaotic messiness.

“Mel called,” Noah said, “Someone leaked we’re thinking of getting RaineFall back together.”

“So?” I asked with a shrug as I walked in, “Hasn’t that happened at least once a year since we broke up the band?”

“Not like this,” he said, shaking his head, “the person behind it had access to Jack’s songs and leaked them as proof. Mel’s trying to get them off the internet, but it’s not going well. And the songs themselves… I mean, you saw them, right?”

“They… were terrible,” I reluctantly agreed, though some I thought might be able to be fixed with some edits. Or a lot of edits. Or a complete refresh.

“And nobody can get a hold of Jack, and Mel’s afraid he’s about to spiral and…”

“Jack’s in rehab,” I interrupted, and Noah blinked in surprise. “I thought he would’ve told everyone they took his phone, but I guess he forgot. Or didn’t realize he should tell you.”

“Great timing since he can’t see how badly all of his hard work is tanking,” Noah muttered, “But it feels like they’re trying to end the comeback before it even starts. Wild since we don’t even know if it’s happening.”

“And it came out today, ensuring you’d be off your game on opening night,” I continued, finally figuring out the point my brother was getting to. I’d been lucky enough to miss most of that news. Nobody thought to message me about RaineFall anymore, and I hadn’t posted on social media in years. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if I remembered any of my passwords, though Mel definitely had a list somewhere if I needed them.

“I can’t have another play bomb, especially not this one. I’ve put everything into it, and… you know I’ve been obsessed with Great Comet for years; we’re finally making sure it gets the recognition it deserves. And since there’s now no way Jack’s going to show up to answer questions, everyone’s going to ask me and I won’t…”

“There’s a red carpet for the premiere, right?” I asked, cutting him off, “Why don’t we have Mel write out some talking points, and I’ll handle it.”

“Kam, you haven’t done a red carpet in years. Are you really sure you want to now?” Noah pointed out, and he was right.

“I know the drill,” I insisted, thinking back to the hours upon hours of media training I’d had, “play down the rumors, talk about how people are nostalgic, talk about how unfortunate it was Jack’s privacy was violated. And most importantly, don’t confirm anything.”

“Well… yeah,” Noah said, taking a breath, “But are you sure you want to? It’ll start more rumors if you’re the one doing damage control, especially when you’ve been out of the spotlight for years. I don’t want you to feel like I’m forcing you to do this.”

“I’m offering,” I assured Noah, putting my hands on my brother’s shoulders, “You deserve to have a good opening night, and I have a feeling Stef is behind this. Best way to beat her is to brush it off.”

“Stef?” Noah asked, looking at me with confusion, “First of all, since when are you the first to know these sorts of things? And second, why Stef?”

“I told you, Jack’s in rehab. He showed up drunk to Thanksgiving and hit rock bottom. I tried calling her after Thanksgiving, and I’m blocked. With how nasty they’ve been, my gut just tells me Stef is trying to hit him where it hurts. And I don’t want Jack to deal with this kind of stress when he’s trying to get better.”

Noah winced, and I wished I could read his mind. I didn't know if he'd seen Jack’s issues the same way I had. Noah was the baby of the family, and with it came the subconscious need to protect him. Even now, I could tell that was part of my reasoning for taking on the damage control. But at the same time, Noah deserved to be successful, and I knew he’d worked hard at the career he’d carved out for himself. It wasn’t the easiest to go from boyband to Broadway — and despite Jack’s insistence that Noah’s past few shows were flops, the reviews had always painted him as a bright spot.

I’d never been a musical theater person, not in the way Noah was. But while the last few musicals he'd done had been new and apparently had a lot of issues in development after he’d signed on, Great Comet was a dream production for him. He’d been so upset we were touring when it was originally on Broadway, and he never got a chance to see it. And with the discourse around the play, I was pretty sure he was starting to get superstitious he was a bad luck charm.

“You get ready,” I assured him, “I’ll call Mel and figure out the talking points.” Stress seemed to melt off my brother’s frame as he went to take a shower, and I opened my phone and called the number I’d been sure I'd never need to call again.

“Kameron. Alexander. Raine. I thought you deleted my number,’ she said after answering on the first ring. “And then you text me out of the blue about getting doxxed at some random town hall, and don’t even bother to call after I clean up your mess.”

“Hey, Mel,” I said, feeling like a child who’d just gotten in trouble. But the sad thing was, it was somewhat right: Mel was the closest thing we had to a parent anymore. Which was a sad thing to say about your publicist.

“If you’re about to complain about the leak, I’ll let you know it’s not my fault I can’t get ahold of your good-for-nothing twin,” she warned.

“Jack went into rehab two days after Thanksgiving,” I explained, pinching the bridge of my nose. I really wished I was surprised Jack hadn’t told anyone, but it was like him to put me in a situation where I’d have this conversation twice in the same hour. “They took his phone.”

“Oh,” she said, shock filling her voice, “That changes things. Obviously, we won’t let that come out unless he wants it to, but I can work with this.”

“I also wanted to walk the red carpet tonight and do all the scandal interviews so Jack and Noah can both focus on what they need to,” I continued, “Jack probably has no idea, which is for the best.”

“Kam. Sweetie.” Mel said, in a way that made me feel like I was about to get a lecture, “You realize that won’t actually help the rumors? I say this with love, as you boys are my favorite clients, but you’ve been a social recluse since RaineFall imploded. If people see you out and about, they’re not only going to ask about the rumors; they’re going to ask about Julia. And, I’m not sure you’re up for it.”

I hadn’t thought of that. In deciding to help Noah, I forgot people would still see what Julia and I had as public consumption — even though the two of us fought tooth and nail to keep it from happening. Outside of the initial statement about her death, I hadn’t talked about it at all. Nor did I plan on it, even if it did come up tonight.