Page 70 of I’m Dreaming of a New York Christmas

‘Are you okay, Flora?’

I stilled instantly, my eyes snapping open. Ethan’s voice was quiet but steady, confirming my assumption that he, too, was wide awake. This was it: the actual crossroads. Within the next two seconds, I had to decide:

Issue a generic response and try to sleep.

Or get into bed with him.

I sat up and quietly swivelled on my knees so I was facing the foot of the bed, my eyes almost adjusted to the darkness.

All I could make out was his silhouette. But it wasn’t a horizontal silhouette – Ethan was sitting upright, just like me.

It was the final piece of information I needed to make my decision. I clambered over the back of the sofa and crawled towards him. It was an unsexy crawl, but I didn’t care: because it was the quickest way I could press my mouth to his.

Chapter 14

‘Well, then.’ My words were the first ones either of us had spoken for many hours, although they definitely weren’t the first sounds either of us had made. We’d eventually fallen asleep a couple of hours after I’d crawled into his bed and now it was just gone eight o’clock on Sunday morning. The lack of wind-like sounds from outside suggested the snowstorm had calmed but, right now, I felt no urge to leave Ethan’s embrace to take a look. The almost ultraviolet brightness seeping in through the slatted blinds did suggest, however, that it was a white city out there.

‘Haha, “well, then” to you, too. You are so British, Flora Bell,’ Ethan planted a kiss on my forehead, which I swiftly transformed into a lazy, luxurious snog.

‘I’ve never done anything like that – this – before,’ I said, after I pulled away, letting the pillow cradle my head once more.

‘Wait, you’re not saying you’ve never…’

‘What? No! Although… you’re only the second person I’ve slept with.’

‘Ah, I see. My tally’s not that much bigger. Although what I would say is…’ Ethan exhaled before flipping over onto his side to face me. ‘This – with you – is the best it’s ever felt, with anyone.’

I sighed happily. ‘Same.’

‘Were you and this other guy together for a long time? Sorry – do you mind me asking?’

Given that I still couldn’t really talk to Laurie about anything Will-related, the fact that I really didn’t mind Ethan’s question came as a shock.

‘No, it’s okay. We got together when we were eighteen. We met on our first day at university.’

I wanted to tell him more, so I did, albeit in a voice that wasn’t far from a whisper. ‘We were… due to get married this year.’

Ethan sat quickly upright, pulling the covers around his stomach. ‘Shit, what happened?’

Tell him the short version.

‘Two days before the wedding, Will – that’s his name – changed his mind. I’ve not seen or spoken to him since.’

‘Woah. Did he tell you why?’

‘No, not really. It all started with a row about his speech, funnily enough. Then it came out that he’d been feeling unsure for a while and it all came to a head.’

‘Fuck! I’m really sorry that happened to you.’

‘Thanks. It’s been… a lot.’

‘Did you live with him in Bath?’

‘No, in London. I moved to Bath a couple of months ago to be closer to Laurie – my best friend. Fresh start and all that.’

‘Yeah, relatable.’

I left a pause, expecting him to share his own story of heartbreak and woe, but he remained silent.