Page 114 of River Wild

He sighs. “You know I was sorry for that.”

“Yeah, I know. And I know that your actions stemmed from what’d happened in your past. But I don’t know everything about your past. So, therefore, I don’t know what else you’re capable of.”

I would never have thought this of him before now. But, after this, I’m thinking it.

“That’s low, Red.”

I lift my chin. “No. It’s the truth. You want me to trust that you would never physically hurt me? Then, tell me where you went tonight. Where did the blood come from? Or who did it come from?”

His eyes darken to black, brows lowering. “Why did you move here, Carrie? Who’s the father of your baby?”

My mouth slams shut. I wrap my arms over my chest, trying to ward off the chill I feel inside.

“Just what I thought.” He lets out a humorless laugh. “I don’t know shit about you, Carrie. And I don’t ask shit about you. So, don’t fucking come in here, into my house, demanding to know where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing when you’re not willing to give up anything on yourself. We don’t talk about the big stuff. That’s how this thing works between you and me.” He gestures a finger between us.

I take another step back, ready to turn and walk out of here.

Then, I change my mind.

And move forward a step.

“You’re right. I’m asking you to tell me things about yourself that you’ve probably never told anyone. And, all the while,you don’t know a single thing about me. Not one thing. And it’s stupid. Because we should know each other. I want to know you because I care about you, River. So, here it is. This is me, laid bare.” I spread my hands out.

“I was married for seven years. I’m still married. And my husband—the police detective—” I see River’s eyes flash with an emotion that I know links back to his stepdad. “Yep, that’s right; I’m married to a cop. Who I can never divorce because I can’t risk him finding out where I am; if he does, he will kill me. Without a doubt. Because behind the good cop facade he wears for the rest of the world is a sick, violent sadist, who, for almost every day of the seven years I was with him, beat and raped me to the point of unconsciousness.” I swallow against the memories prickling at my skin.

“And, when I found out I was pregnant, I ran. I stole his dirty cop money. Got a new identity. Changed the color of my hair. Climbed onto that bus that brought me here and became Carrie Ford. So, that’s why I won’t be around violence, River. Because I lived it. And I risked my life to escape it. Because I will give my child a better life than the life I had, no matter the cost to me. I won’t be around violence again in any way, shape, or form. I will not have my child’s life tainted by it.

“So, you see, this is why I’m asking you where you were tonight and where the blood came from. And I will ask again one last time …” I pull in a fortifying breath. “Where were you tonight, River?”

I wait.

Heart in my throat. Chest pounding. Blood roaring in my ears.

But his answer never comes.

So, I do the only thing I can.

I walk out of there, and I don’t look back.